-Gris Grimly

So, Part 2 in my Year End Entry of what I'd like to say was quite eventful. I mean, you really haven't lived unless your mother finds your girlfriend's panties in the laundry pile, holds them up, and doesn't hide that smile we all know she's winking about.

Editor: "Let's all bow our heads to give thanks to women giving their panties to the most deserving men this world has to offer."

Today has been a day of catching up and helping myself to start the new year. I've scoured my closet to rid clothes that I no longer wear or are just plain fucked up after being in there for too long. It's nice finding things that mean so much since certain shirts were worn at events that I will in no way forget about. Goodwill is gonna love me!

Just finished reading the Bill Maher interview and wondered if his thought that life was meant to work our way to selflessness is correct. The man is a genius so it's something to think about.

Okay, on with the show as my eventful year has ended...............

Let's start with the TV season. I no longer watch much due to that hatred of just sitting there like a complete zombie absorbing commercials where people blurt out how much they have to poop. It's cute how there is that one that adds some dancing that helps mime where a person might expell something but the product will make it all better. The sport playing geezers were a nice touch as we all know diarhea causes wonderful facial expressions.

My whole TV watching was pretty much within the means of MTV's Making the Band 3 and Veronica Mars. If you have not seen Miss Mars and co., do so. Do it now. Veronica Mars is the best TV show and highly addictive as to the character's standing up for herself no matter how ostracized the school makes her feel. Plus, I just love the dad and Wallace (her best friend). Damn, isn't it cool that they have a black family that isn't the usual stereotype in regards to Wallace?

Making the Band was fun as it was pro-longed due to Diddly's insistance that he did not find what he was looking for in the first set of girls trying out. My whole anger was towards how he made these girls do so much while the rappers he puts out don't do squat. Here is Diddly telling the girls that he wants something special to shine but when Diddly himself hosts........*ahem*..the MTV Music Awards only to bore us, I wonder if this 35 year old is worthy or OUR time.

Who can forget about Being Bobby Brown? I caught a few episodes and, yes, I laughed when Whitney Houston talked about her constipation:

"That turd was too big."

How can a woman, well, she is pretty much full of crack so why not, decide to air very embarassing bodily moments? According to Bobby and Whitney, "black love" is helping each other out by getting the poop out together. Somewhere out there, I am sure that midgets are happy that they are no longer the butt of jokes but Whitney's butt is.

I miss the midgets, though. They make me laugh.

So, in regards to this Year In Review Part 2, how can I forget about work? I wrote so many entries on my love/hate towards it. I had star crossed lovers that had no regards to how bad they smelled or looked. To think that just maybe Ugly and Stinky did the nasty in an aisle without my boss and I knowing would be a great thing.

Now, I know the whole putting 2 virgins together that have no experience in regards to even touching the opposite sex is as toxic as Whitney Houston's ass. Hell, I remember my worries that I would put my dick in the wrong hole but Stinky is a whole different category unknown to man. The sweat pouring down the guy's face as he realizes that his hard-on has to go somewhere would be a great outtake added to William Hung's Greatest Hits DVD.

C'mon, your remember William Hung! "She Bangs" was something we were tortured with for too long. It will not die, dammit!

In all seriousness, working with people like Stinky and Ugly was fun. I'm just not sure if things worked out even if Ugly told me they were "taking it slow." The next time I see my boss, Doug, I am going to ask if he knows what's happened since as I last saw Ugly and Stinky walk off into the cold morning darkness together. That is romance as it is hard for the two of them to see each other but she knows he's there since you can smell him.

Oh, I did get addicted to the TV show, Grey's Anatomy as George is my favorite character.

My battles with the evil Crotch Rot continued, of course. That woman despises me when I have fun as I worked/talked with my co-workers while things in the store slowed down. My boss knew how much Crotch Rot was full of shit so he shrugged it off. I did my job and I did it well.

Clown, on the other hand, harassed me but did nothing in regards to her own job (or section of the store) by just leaving her work right there on the floor. It was a mess as I get chewed out by this woman wearing layers and layers of makeup at how bad I am. Just know that I love the fear in her eyes as I look directly into her face to tell her I do MY job.

Tampons. I never thought I'd ever have to see a used tampon/pad in all my life. Now, I know damn well what they are and all that while my old fear of even a tampon box making an appearance scared me. Yes, I was chased out of rooms thanks to a box of Stay Frees many times as girls would laugh. It's that whole not wanting to face reality since I'm totally all for putting my mouth there.

But I did it. Somehow, I got over my fear and got rid of the damn tampon drive-bys that our parking lot seems to get. I'm guessing that working in a store that is within bad neighborhoods and trailer trash has this happen as women pull up to dump out that week's used tampons. The worst are the heavy days but I damn well hate the sticky portion of pads. Hard fuckers to get off your rubber gloves.

The year in music? All I can say is that I wish Ashlee Simpson would go away and this whole Nick and Jessica divorce would just be forgotten about. Why people worship those with no talent is confusing the hell out of me. Paris Hilton has a CD coming out? Let's just add to the stupidity as we already knew Lindsay Lohan was doing cocaine and had an eating disorder. Why this Vanity Fair interview of her admittance is so shocking is odd to me, yo.

The balance was, actually, pretty good. Garbage came out with a new album along with Fiona Apple. I know because Sara plays them in the car on each visit. You really have to see her rock out in the car to songs as not only does she sing the whole damn song but unleashes what could be called "head banging." Ask for the hair twirl and you shall receive, too.

Life wasn't with just Sara. I do have friends, ya know? Some just might be imaginary with names like "Ted" and "Tom" but good ol' Bald-O is as real as it gets. The last time I saw him was July 4th at the usual fireworks and get drunk fest while this time I did NOT light them from my butt.

I miss Bald-O and it hurts that he has still not gotten his hernia issues dealt with. Something is also wrong with his shoulder. Man, I've told Bald-O thousands of times that he has got to change his lifestyle of heavy drinking and eating the worst. Not only has he not gotten any of that good woman loving due to his large stomach hanging out while his face has been french kissing the porcelin gods but also he has not grown up. Booze cruises every weekend still? Bald-O's a great guy but I want him to think about his health more than that sale on Natty Light (Natural Light beer).

My own health? Oh, don't get me started on my own fear of that bump on my back. It's not huge or anything but it sure as hell is noticable. Yes, I do have a fear of cancer along with dreams of being eaten by a great white shark while skinny dipping since I am low in cholesterol but full of shit.

It's what Sara pointed out while in Barnes & Noble that has me alarmed. We looked up information on dyslexia and so many of the symptoms are things I notice about myself. I did well in college but certain tests were not my cup of tea. "A's" on papers but fucked up tests were my ritual as I just could not get things in my head. ADD? Oh, I have no clue as I am so smart in certain areas but completely lousy in others. Sara's showing of that book had me in great fear as I cannot drop this issue of dyslexia.

It's been a great year for me, personally. I'm surprised that many of you stuck with me through all my filthy thoughts on sex and life. All I have been doing is just showing you the truthfulness as to why and what we men see in regards to the female form or sex itself. My entry on why I love to perform oral sex on girls was a huge hit as it was looked at over and over by *wink wink* certain readers. I know who you are as I'm hoping that entry was printed up and placed in breakrooms everywhere. Plus, my yearly entry on why I love vaginas was second. Who knew women wished for a guy to just shout all this out to the mountains.

Thank you for putting up with me over my 4 or so years of reign here on Diaryland. I'm hoping there are many more to come so who knows what will come out of this mind as I continue to sleep with a wonderful girl and can't wait to meet a few of you thanks to invites. 2006, huh? How many think that Britney gets divorced while Bobby Brown curses the next time his wife eats a large meal?

My favorite note senders:

-Hiss
-Summer
-Sammy
-Slow-Poke
-Hoar
-And others that sent me some to make me think.

I hope all of you that are single and wish to have a good boyfriend do find someone. In this day of stupidity being encouraged while actual smarts is frowned upon, that's hard to do. I know. That's why I love it how Sara wants to make hot monkey love to Bill Maher (besides me, of course). Just remember to inspect penises since every girl deep down is a size queen that demands a clean one full of ammunition (or nourishment, if that's your bag, baby) for play. No 69ing if a visit to Taco Bell took place beforehand.

Well, girls, if there was a large orgy going on, I'd hope to find y'all there! We can vote on who does the best trimming jobs since I'm quite pleased with mine. Happy twats all around.

P.S. Could there be a Part 3 of my Year In Review?

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07