Warning:

This entry could be considered disgusting b by some, interesting by others, and just downright pathetic by the rest. Don't say I didn't warn you.

There are 3 sexual practices that I consider to be gross. I know there is one where people are hung by needles in their flesh but this is different.

First there are the urine drinkers. It's not a huge deal since urine is mostly water and salts. I saw an ad for the "love toilet" in which a woman would sit down on. Underneath would be a place for a guy/girl to put his/her head face up. The person would pee directly into the mouth. Don't kill the messenger! I know this is disgusting (kind of funny, too).

Yes, there are shit eaters. I never knew they existed til Luthor Campbell of 2 Live Crew did an interview where he talked about some fans of his that wanted his group to shit for some them and let them eat it. Ugh. This makes my stomach feel funny right now. No more on that.

The grossest thing that almost made me throw up is the "tampon suckers." What these guys do is wait til their girlfriend/wife has the need to change her tampon. Then they are given this thing to suck on or lick. Now, aren't you happy to hear about that? Good morning to you, too.

Oral sex is fun but did you know there are calories in it? Of course you did! You understand science. Well, there are 7 calories in each teaspoon of semen. Men cum at 28 mph and shoot 1 to 2 teaspoons.

It's funny when I look back at this info. When I told Kristan that there was an article on every vitamin and chemical in cum, she insisted on me bringing it. We looked at this together and found that there are a lot of vitamin in it. Potassium, vitamin E, and protein just to name a few.

I never understood a few things about oral sex. In the old days, it used to be the only place a guy could get a blowjob was after he was married or from a hooker. Nowadays, it seems like girls are expected to perform. This troubles me since many of them don't insist their men go down on them as well.

In my experience, girls have gone down on me before I have ever been inside them. In my opinion, I like penetration best since it's fun to cum together at the same time. You just need to learn control. It's also really warm and slick in there! Now, I know oral sex is more pleasurable thanks to the women's lips but I really prefer actual sex.

Girls cum, too! Yes, there is about 4 to 7 calories in it. Now, I know girls don't cum like guys do but it's there. The lubrication or "wetness" is from water vessels that burst. It has more of a watery taste and some taste bitter. It all depends. I like it.

Not all girls have the same scent from their vaginas. Some smell like a bacteria indulgence. Others have a really odd trace of something. I really don't know how to describe the smell. Is that weird? There was one girl that I went down on that had this amazing scent. I loved to be down there for long periods of time.

The scent of the vagina can be changed. There is a food that can be eaten to make it smell like tar. I am not kidding about this. Just like guys are said to taste different when drinking, girls smell different from foods.

It's funny how they still debate orgasms for women. We now know they have them since it just takes them longer to experience. When I was still inside D and she was experiencing orasm, she would lay on top of me and let me feel them. It was like a shaking feeling and then there would be "after effects." It was fun that she would share them with me. The only real debate is still over whether women hava a G-Spot. It's said to be found by placing your finger inside and curling it as if signaling someone to "come here."

The strange thing about the studying of sex was the the first people used were mentally ill. So, the scientists thought that whatever these people thought was abnormal. People weren't bothered to be asked. All forms of sex were considered abnormal except penetration itself. Says a lot doesn't it? Freud was a pain by insisting that women only had vaginal orgasms.

The clitoris is kind of funny. I have the hardest time finding it. I swear! D would show me all the time because I lost track of the damn thing. I used to massage M's late at night for her. It helped her sleep. To me, it was so pleasing to see her in pleasure. The clitoris is considered the main pleasure area and girls still don't know this! Arrghh. Learn.

Hollywood has a weird censorship system. If an erection is shown onscreen, the movie will be given an "X" or "NC-17." The reason most actors will not do full frontal nudity is because they don't want their penises to be seen as small. They do have a point. Men have this hangup that if they show their weiners, they must be full-fledged rockets and not elephant trunks. One actor said, "It's damned if you do and damned if you don't." Harvey Keitel shows his all the time it seems.

So, ladies, you will have to settle for men getting out of bed in PJs or shorts while the girl gets out of bed topless or fully nude. I know it's a double standard but Hollywood is never fair. You'll have to stick to porn to see those hoo-has. I know you want to see Brad's penis........

When porn first began, it was distributed to places like pool halls to show. A guy would come to it with a bunch of 8MMs to give. Once the deal was done, no one heard from him til later. Men would crowd around and watch whatever was shown for a fee. Kind of like the dorms of today, huh? Things really don't change.

- - 2009-07-07

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