Now, a big announcement! You know how my birthday is September 6th? C'mon! I told you guys so you should REMEMBER this. It's not that difficult at all. Just know the one of the numbers in the "Devil's Sign" is the date. There is no "66" or "666" so it's gotta be "6." You should be ashamed of yourselves for forgetting. It makes me want to do what the nuns did to me, everyone must give me kisses on the cheek and a pat on my ass. Okay, so the nuns didn't make me pat their flabby asses. It's my diary!

Well, the announcement is that Poison is coming to MY town the day after my birthday! Oh, how hair-metal bands of the 80s make me all gooey inside like a Hostess Twinkie! No one but me can perfectly mimic Bret Michael of Poison's voice while singing "Every Rose Has It's Thorn." Everyone tells me I give a really good rendition of it. This is a big deal to me since I love......hmmmm...."Fallen Angel" and a lt of other Poison songs. The fact that this band is coming the day after my birthday makes it even better.

Oh, Skid Row and Vince Neil are coming as well. We all know how Vince loves to fuck groupies more than any other. Should be some girls at the concert in "fuckable skirts" ready for easy access. I don't care much for Vince's music. Skid Row has 2 good songs that I love. "18 And Life" I know by heart because it speaks an interesting amount of aggression. "Piece Of Me" is pretty good as well. I love the song "I Remember You" and it's well timed theme. Oh, those days of listening to Skid Row are good memories.

"Cruising in the city

I'm lookin for a fight"

Jeff, that guy I work out with in my gym, might be going with me to the concert. He also likes Poison so I'm hoping. All of us 20 year olds know "Every Rose Has It's Thorn." You just couldn't escape how good that song was on the radio back then.

"We both lie silently still in the middle of the night

Even though we both lie close together,

We feel miles apart inside."

I'll get into more about Poison later on. I'm just so stoked about this! Guess I have no problem with guys in heavy eyeliner, huh?

Unfortunately, this hasn't been the best of weeks. My mom's friend has a great dog named Jackie. Great dog!!! I used to housesit on occasion for my mom's friend, D. When I went there, Jackie would expect me to take care of her. Oh, she was fun to take care of since she was also well trained. Jackie and I would sit on the couch and watch a little TV even though she wasn't allowed to do that. The interesting thing about her was that Jackie was abused. She has a hard time with males. Amazingly enough, Jackie loves me!

Jackie was put down this weekend thanks to breathing problems. I just found this out coming home today and it's upsetting. Really upsetting. It's just now all those times I housesitted Jackie makes me feel awful inside. I'm already missing her and how she would look at me once I ordered her to "go potty." There is nothing better than an emotional black labrador retriever with amazing manners. I miss Jackie.

I guess this is a good time to go into the storms that rocked Bald-O's trailer. It was late on Sunday night that this southern area was hit hard by rain and thunder. I was worried that this weather would make it difficult to go home. That trailer really shook as I lay there in the guestroom! Good thing Bald-O was okay because I do not need a half naked bald guy with chattering teeth waking me up to tell me he's scared and wants to get in with me. Nosirree.

Oh, my scrapbook was a hit! Bald-O, Mark, and Crystal loved it. In fact, everyone looked at it at least 3 times. Bald-O thought that the picture of me wearing a thong was the best. Others that everyone loved were my 3rd through 8th grade pics of me with my nuns (Fucking bitches!). Unfortunately, I couldn't show my scrapbook to Bald-O's parents what with the pics of us doing beer bongs. Some of them showed us in his trailer and the parents do not want us to drink one bit. Oh, but my mom thinks it's funny!

So, tomorrow I will try to gather up my courage and see that scrapbook girl. Wish me luck. I'm dying to chat with her as well since she seemed so nice to meet last week. If it doesn't work out, think I should go for the aunt? So many women equals so many decisions.

Wanna hear a really bad pick-up line?

"Nice legs! When do they open?"

How about another one?

"Hey, how about you sit on my face and I'll eat my way to your heart?"

Yes, I've had a girl use a pick-up line on me once. I still cannot figure out why people use them? A simple, "Hi, my name is......" can be used. I love to meet new people.

Oh, remember the entry on wheelchair people? Well, in my gym there is a guy that lost use of his legs and works out like a maniac! Good form and all to him. I've yet to chat with him but I know I will soon enough. Eventually, people just come up to talk for no apparent reason since you're stuck standing there with sweat dripping down your face while resting between sets. Trust me. You've gotta see me drenched from what I do in there. I raise hell but not the 666 kind. Just remember the "6," folks! I expect lot of guestbook signings for my birthday about how you will:

A. Do me

B. Spank me

C. Lick me

D. Or all of the above! I've got stamina and girth!

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07