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| It boggles my mind why 4 very well dressed men sit and bitch about how people should be inside reading the bible. Of course, I also cannot believe that there is even a channel devoted to such a thing. How do they keep it fresh? By the time it rolls to 1am, we see these 4 men suddenly lost in an abyss of alcohol thanks to one being given the powers to change his microwave dinner into an almighty keg. "Boys, let's get funky with Abraham!!" The next thing you know, a couple of actual sisters are called up, beer bongs are busy flowing, and the hookers that arrived late are licking up cocaine out of the coasters. Wow! By 5am, we see the guys blessing each other's penises before the orgy and thanking Jee-zus for the almighty load about to be given to the sisters orally. Now, I don't know about you but I'd start watching at 1:30am and hoping for an invite. Want a good joke? "How do you make Martha Stewart scream twice?" (answer at bottom) We are having an invasion of ladybugs! It's that time of year where you feel a little tiny bite on your neck as you walk into your house. Yup, the ladybugs like to hitch a ride on Ol' Hedgehoggy here for some reason. So far, none have gotten down into my shorts and ridden the "berries"..........yet. What's odd is finding all these dead ladybug carcases in the house. I know it's warmer inside than out there but they seem to think we have the most abundant supply of Cheetos thanks to their usual daily amount of aphids disappearing in the garden. My guess is that ladybugs suddenly come up to my ears at night and wisper: "Dude, leave a couple of them good Cheetos and I won't bite your ass. Franky over there has just been itching to shit in your shoe so if I were you, I would bogart them. Thanks, bud." Of course, ladybugs would want a big shout out here on Diaryland. (I have no idea why I am doing this but, "What's up Harry, Sally, and Peanut!" Noticed that the new Rolling Stone with Britney Spears is sold out everywhere! I knew this would happen, right? What bugs the hell out of me is that RS puts Britney in the issue but she doesn't have anything going right now. The video isn't til October 11th and album has been moved til November so why does Rolling Stone put her on!?! I can understand if she had these things going on now but it's obvious in these trying times that the magazine is more out to make a buck than to inform people about great music. I'm still pissed about the Olsen twins being given a cover and a feature. Just how low can Rolling Stone go? If Oprah makes it, that issue should be toilet paper. I swear. Well, there isn't much to report. It's a dull cool day out there and I have to stay here this weekend. Thanks to my dad's stupidity, there will be no going south. He may have gone to the emergency room but it's his fault and I don't want to get into it. Thanks, Dad. Once again, you've pissed me off with your selfishness. So, I would love to get into other things that I've observed like Hot Topic Girl and I, the latest Survivor episode (funny!) and so on but I'm too beat down as it is. Hope all is better elsewhere with everyone else. Sammy, please send me an email, I'm bored out of my skull. *"Fuck her in the ass and then wipe your dick on the curtains."* 0 Got Balls? |
- - 2009-07-07 Love Facebook - 2009-05-07 Retards Away! - 2009-02-16 Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28 My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07 |