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| On some nights, it feels like high school all over again when I think about it. You've got your jocks, the people wanting to fit in by "getting bigger," punks with far too many tattoos, quiet people, and so on. Today was a weird one in that rumors abound........just like high school. The thing that's up is that there is a guy named Mike that works out in my gym. I remember when he first came, he was slightly built. Well, Mike had big arms but just wasn't what we weight-lifters call "cut," meaning you can see all the veins and muscle detail. Now he is but....... Mark and I were discussing Mike in the locker room once Mike left. It's clear (even more clear to me) that Mike is on steroids. You don't call them this but with terms like "'roids," "juicin," and so on. Theres all kinds of words for the use of steroids. You see, Mike is heavily into himself and cannot walk past a mirror without lifting up his shirt or flexing. Most of us laugh at how pathetic he is in how it's like nothing else is important. Mike is also not too bright. You should hear some of his conversations that Jeff, Will, and I make fun of at times. For a code word in talking about Mike (word travels fast in my gym), we call him "Mr. Blow-Up Doll." Will gave me the idea to call him that. Mike's nice to me so I don't worry much and besides, he won't take me in a fight. I'm close to his equal without the 'roids and I seem to have a high pain threshold. It's just that it annoys me how pathetic Mike is. Oh, you should see how he *thinks* he is a "ladies man." I once asked him about his girlfriend that he worked out with, a very nice girl, by the way. His answer was: "Which one?" I've always hated players or whatever the term is nowadays. Since my mom is a strong willed woman, the respect for women grew with me. There's also a lot of girls in my past that brought this. My only problem with most women is how awfully dumb they've become. One guy said it best: "Women today behave like teenage boys." Alas, that is a topic to get into on another day. If I discussed this, I'd rather be able to put a lot of thought into it. Oh, I can feel the rage of the hardcore feminists rising but I really must say: FUCK YOU!!!! In summing up, my gym really is like high school all over. You can walk in and find little schools of people that only coverse amongst themselves. There are exceptions like me whom love to meet different types of people. Yes, I've gotten to know gang members (gasp!), strippers, bodybuilders, athletes, and the occasional old woman that doesn't wear panties. Let's not forget the previous entry on the lady with an embarassing "wet spot." Can you imagine that stain combined with her "skid marks?" The horror! The horror! Today's workout wasn't bad since I'm trying new things to liven it up. Gawd, I was in there from 6pm til close to 8pm thanks to working out, talking, and tasting a smoothie. Yup, the girl working the desk let me have a bit of hers, even though I don't like peach. I'm more of a cherry, strawberry, and orange type o' guy. We did have a highlight in the gym tonight that gave Jeff and I the laughs we needed while taking temporary rests from our workout. No offense to gay males but the sight of them being really close if funny! You see, we have an aerobics room that is used in the early evening. No one was in there since the classes let out early. These 2 guys in VERY tight shorts decided to take off their shoes, socks, and shirts to work out together. It was hysterical to watch one of them in tiny shorts all while jumping rope. Mind you, this guy did have some "man tits" that bounced up and down. I'm not sure why some guys wear really tiny shorts to the gym but if that works for 'em.......Just don't ask me to. It seems to happen more with older guys that think a big saggy ass is cool and that they have not lost that youthful look now replaced by mountains of flab. "Look, Dear! I can still fit my high school shorts!" "What's all that shit hanging out of 'em, honey?" My balls do not need to be scrunched together. Ever. I'm not sure the sight of a guy in tight shorts even interests women at all. Discuss amongst yourselves. Hey, at least Ol' Tiny Dick didn't make an appearance in the locker room tonight. Well, I'm going to be leaving for Southern Illinois (I know all the little towns practically since I've been in 'em) tomorrow evening for a fun filled drinking with the boys. I'll say goodbye tomorrow before I leave, okay? Nothing like a group of ex-baseball players that still *think* they can play the game to sit around doing beer bongs. Yup, a night of watching an endless sky and me taking a long piss on the tree. We do our part in watering the area's vegetation. Why don't you? Just be sure to wipe since no one likes embarassing "wet spots." Goodnight. 0 Got Balls? |
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