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| Woke up to a weird sight this morning. Here I was pretty much barely awake standing at my window looking at all these little bugs moving around. Of course, they weren't the usual garden variety of bugs but ladybugs. I counted 7 outside the window but that doesn't even count the one that slept with me last night. Yup, as I stood there, a ladybug began walking up my neck. "Thanks for a wonderful night, Hedgehoggy! Your tongue beats any "magic wand" and those fingers massaged allllllll the right parts." My thoughts on these ladybugs bear on the fact that first they will seek shelter just as anything will do when it gets colder. It's the next part that all of us should worry about. They're here for the people! The Peeeeeeeeooooooooppple! It's kind of like Independence Day in which the ladybugs will start to make their appearance and then take over here and there by overloading us with their weight. Just how much does 2000 ladybugs weigh? Next, they'll skimmy on into our ears to lodge on to our brains, causing us to kill one another. Ladybugs win! Scary but mark my words. Those bastards are up to something. So, I'm back from a long hot bath to which I am letting my spiky hair dry itself. I've never been prone to hair dryers and such since they are loud and I don't like to make my scalp feel like I dipped it into a volcano. Since I'm a big reader of many things, I know it's healthier to let my hair dry on its own. Just witness all the little wet spots I leave. To which I have found another zit. Located right near my spine is a spot of pink painfulness. Thanks to many nerves located in such a delicate place, a zit right there can be more than a mere annoyance. Why!?! I'm not supposed to be breeding such things. High school is long ago, folks. So, I did what any teenager would do in such a situation. I popped the motherfucker. Of course, it hurt but I'm a big boy that can deal with pain. After all, I listened to Mister Religious's "I'm serving Jee-zus speech" for so long. Any other person would slap the shit out of him. Thanks to an overload of commercials for "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" remake, I'm revving to go. The first time I saw that flick was in college to which it scared the shit out of me even then. Of course, we watched TCM late that night to the delight of Newman's roomates laughing at us for being so behind in horror culture. A midnight showing to Texas Chainsaw Massacre sounds like a good time. I'm curious what they've done that's different than the original. Since I've already seen Leatherface, the only curiousity would be to know what if it's even scary. Of course, I don't mind the added sex appeal of Jessica Biel or Erica Leershon. Whoo! Long haired brunettes make me all gooly inside. So, I'm not going south this weekend after all! I'll be getting my last pair of Air Jordans for a long time, at least til they wear out. The weather predicted is pretty bad anyway. See? Dreams do come true but I can't wait to see the gang even if it's not the complete Scooby Gang. That would be Berta, Corey, and so on added to a night of drinking and silly songs. A person here on Diaryland placed a giant picture of a vagina on her site that labeled all the areas of it. It set me back for a few seconds but I understood what she was doing. A girl asked the question as to why she bled after being fingered by her boyfriend. The answer was so simple that I kind of had the nerve to spit venom. Why doesn't this girl know her own anatomy? Hell, I know pretty much all about vaginas thanks to......uh......well, call them "experiences," okay? Anyway, the reason this girl bled was because of the hymen being torn. Usually, it recedes as time passes or things such as horseback riding and gymnastics destroy it. I've know that for a long time so why don't girls know their own twats!?! Then again, I don't know my cock as well as I should. I only know a few of the tubes within me to which things magically happen. Maybe a leprauchaun comes down and tells girls that it's "magically delicious" as she goes down on me all while giving me the added power to orgasm. The hell if I know. Maybe I should give my rendition as to what a guy thinks about in twats, what makes them sexy and such. Do girls even want to know what a guy thinks about vaginas? Calista and I did debate this topic once. 12 days til this diary is locked. 0 Got Balls? |
- - 2009-07-07 Love Facebook - 2009-05-07 Retards Away! - 2009-02-16 Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28 My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07 |