My mother is a cereal whore. There I said it! What I mean is that I looked into the closet that stores all our cereal to find not one, not two, not three, but 25 boxes of cereal for us to eat at breakfast.

*I occasionally eat a bowl after I work out*

This is what insanity is all about, folks! My mother will walk into a store selling "Strawberry Cheerios" to which she will end up walking out with up to 9 boxes of the damn stuff! I ask her why and I get the same statement:

"It was on sale."

Arrrrrrgh! I appreciate how much she makes sure that we have enough cereal to eat here in the household but I feel like if there were to be a tornado or something, the whole family will be in the closet eating cereal til it's over. I will most likely hear this:

"Now, Michael, don't you ever call me a "cereal whore" again! Do you hear me, you little shit (her words, not mine) and start worshiping me for being an amazing domestic goddess."

25 boxes of Strawberry Cheerios to consider eating for the next few months. Oh, there will be more. Mark my words. There will be more coming into this house. No milk, please.

For which I notice little things I am similar to my dear mother, the cereal whore. Remember my white shirts to which I have yet to wear? I'm up to 26 plain white Ralph Lauren t-shirts all at $5 each. Nice. It just looks to weird to open my closet and find a row of them. I'm a t-shirt whore but I'm okay.

After my workout shorts came out of the wash, I noticed the hole is getting dangerously near my crotch.

"Hey......uh, Hedgehoggy. How's it hanging? Looks like yours is going to the left....uh, dude this is embarassing. Have you ever thought about getting new shorts so I can stop staring at your pee-pee?"

If you ever find an item in clothing that you absolutely love, you will understand why I am hoping to live my shorts out to the end of time. Just a thread? At least my crack is safe from being exposed?

I love my baggy tan cargo shorts to work out in. They hold my gloves to which I have to switch mid-workout thanks to my hands needing different durability.

Hell, Misty had the nerve to stick her hands in my pockets since she wondered why I had a "black item" in them. It didn't bother me but I did find it odd to see her so bold.

Don't worry. I'm not working out in doing that "leg spreader" machine so my nutsack will hang out.

*What the fuck did I just say!?!*

The point is that you find something to wear that you love to it's outmost extent, it's hard to part with it. Hey, I still remember my old blankie and occasionally wonder where it went. As a young child, I toga'd early with it.

Well, I'm not completely in a talkative mood after causing my mom to laugh at my "cereal whore" conversation. I've also got a headache to which I hope I can get some sleep tonight. The extra hour was minimal and funny how I was a bit confused thanks to my mom not setting her clock back. Lucky for me, I made it in time to see "Alias."

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