Let's guillotine Grandpa!

Let's guillotine Grandpa

and put Grandma in the soup!"

I'm laughing at that song lyric. If you can figure out where that came from, I'll lick your toes and sing "Me So Horny" at the local nursing home.

Today has not been an entirely interesting one. For one thing, it wasn't bad and it wasn't spectacular either. I miss those days where I'd say "Craptacular!" Not many can understand my sense of humor.

My dad and I will be heading out to get the DVD recorder tomorrow instead. I'm kind of for this but I wish he'd spend his off-time working out because let's face it. My dad is obese and should get into shape to keep the health problems away. We may not get along entirely but I still want him to clean himself up. Movies can wait.

You see, that's what bugs me. My dad lay around watching "The Rundown" earlier today. It's that new movie with The Rock and Sean William Scott in case you want to know. Then, my dad went to the garage to work on something for this guy. His health is far more important and.....

Yes, I'm still worried about the possibility of something being wrong with me. My chest still feels really strange at times. It's like something wants to come out of my left pectoral muscle. For those that do not know, that's "man booby." Mine are a bit.....big as in muscular.

*I hope I don't sound full of myself but I'm known for my arms, chest, and odd sense of humor*

The problem is that since the weirdness is on the left side, that signifies heart area all the way. I'll do my own personal little tests to see if I'm fucked up or what. Let's not talk about that now since we don't want a worried Hedgehoggy. Then again, we also don't want a dead one as well.

Being a dreary day, I decided to just lay in the bathtub in hot water. If there is one thing that tends to *kind of* pep me up it's a long hot bath. Nothing quite beats laying there and looking at pink toes thanks to scalding water, huh?

When I was stressed in college, I had missed long hot baths but had to let showers do the trick. The only problem was roommates trying to push our female neighbors in with me. Girls are so shy.

Nah, my roommates were just trying to shake dull days up since sitting around farting wasn't doing the trick. Air guitar to AC/DC only works when drunk at 10am. Break dancing cannot be done on beer stained carpets. Debating which roommate should be eaten first if it was the only way to survive brings up too many arguments.

*Apparently, everyone agrees that I am best thanks to low fat, low cholesterol, and a superior dong*

The point is that you can always count on your roommates to bring things up when down thanks to insanity and a pledge in which "what happens in here, stays in here." I miss my boys.

We have a new addition to our family here in HedgehoggyLand. I've always wanted a sister or a foreign pal named "Pip" but this was not what I had in mind.

A mouse came out tonight while my mom was working on papers. It stayed out long enough to say hi and then disappear into the lower cabinet. Ellie-Mae, my big fat Yorkie, was stunned. It could be she's never seen such a creature without a weight problem or the mouse looked tasty.

Again, I have problems with killing our little visitor. My mom is for it since it's been stealing dog food. Oh, that's a real good reason! I'm sure Ellie-Mae talked to my mom about this.

Oh, I've got to let out something that's bugging me tomorrow. Those nasty religious fucks are stirring up things in my head once again. Two letters to the editor had me a bit steamed in their ignorance. Trust me. I'm gonna get downright well into ranting mode soon enough tomorrow if I can sit still!

I can't wait to just fall asleep underneath my covers soon. This day should just be done with in my opinion. Another wish is to sleep in a giagantic bed like I did in Canada to which I could sleep well. Now, that brings back many pleasant memories.

- - 2009-07-07

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