Okay, does anyone want some advice? Never ever eat a whole large pizza all by yourself in 35 minutes. Your stomach feels so awful in an hour that I had not felt that way since a long ago college driking night.

Yeah, I ate a large mushroom/cheese pizza all on my own because I was starved last night. I don't know what brought it on but I just couldn't stop eating all that dripping cheese and mushrooms sliding off thanks to the local stoners' pizza place.

To which I sat there in complete agony as I watched MTV's retched Spring Break shows. It could have been the most boring Spring Break ever that caused my stomach's unpleasant feelings but I'm jeenkies says the cheese was churning a bit too much.

Hopefully, no one will hit me for saying this but I didn't gain a pound, just that shitty feeling. This is the third time in my life where I ate a whole large pizza on my own but the only time I felt like a complete lardass.

Nothing was going right last night! J came over at the designated time, complete with work outfit. After the usual giggles on my bed that occasionally ended in laughter, I find out that her aunt and mother did not think of me in the fondest ways.

Now, I don't know why J's mom is ticked at how I talked about the bad neighborhood J lives in because she told me about how bad it is. There would be cop cars looking for the usual drug busts as I drive home, etc. J told me it's not a big deal so I'll let that one slide.

What really had me down soon was hearing that J's aunt tell J that her ex-boyfriend is much better than me! *Slams fist* Gawd, I guess little ol' me didn't leave a good enough impression to which I don't know if I want to be around the aunt ever again.

How can someone say that!?! J told me that the aunt was telling her to get over the ex, especially in how she was treated by him, but I'm just.......worse? This really hurt to which I hid from J and almost wanted her to leave. It really did sting, folks.

Want more? The aunt also said that she trusts the ex-boyfriend around her kids more so than me! What!?! I've got potential babysitting duty and being labeled for possibly being negligent or something? Gee, thanks! What brought this on was that I teased about how great it was to find Miller Lites in the aunt's fridge. I guess no one knows I'm just joking......or something.

As you can see, I'm pretty down. J and I had a deal in which we wouldn't lie to each other and I did ask what the aunt thought of me since they had lunch together the next day. Fuck if I know what I want to say but I'm just out of it and want to curl up in bed with Gary Jules's "Mad World" on repeat. I just can't win.

Well, if you are looking for a sex story, it aint here. I wasn't even interested in a performance last night after hearing all this shit that felt like I was completely put down. I'm just not good enough this week, huh?

Funny how my parents came home at 4am. Good thing they did because it was a welcome distraction, if temporary. Funny how they went back 3 hours ago. Guess my mom's really strong in driving that many hours all due to finding termites at my grandparents' place and coming back here just to get poison, etc. to kill 'em.

Folks, I have to meet J at her house for dinner but some of me is just too upset to really enjoy it. My mouth is going to be pretty tightly shut around the mom, I'm guessing. Why not? What I have to say just isn't that great anyway.

- - 2009-07-07

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