Fortunately for me, the thunderstorm raging right now is a good thing. Let me tell ya, I was sweating my ass off all day til around 3pm when I finally got a shower. My laundry has developed a new smell other than the sweat of my balls. Don't you love my crass humor?

I know you're probably wonderin' why I got a bath so late. Well, I've been busy all day from my time in the gym to my mom needing me to haul some more boxes out of her 3rd Grade classroom. The white shirt I was wearing was sticking to me so I had to go down the hall with some mighty pointed nipples as my mom's co-workers checked me out. Gawd, I've never had 1st Grade teachers check me out but there's always a first time for everything. Just don't get me started on nuns.

Yeah, I hate how humid it is out there. It feels like my Calvins are riding up my ass all day. What I really wished for was someone to hose me off. Forget a permanent personal soundtrack. How about someone follow me with a hose?

To tell you the truth, I don't know how I ended up in the gym. Without air conditioning in that place, it's like people leave "wet spots" permanently. Hell, I couldn't help but notice this one girl's giant sweat stain up her ass while doing leg lifts. Either she got really turned on or she's going to have really interesting panties when she gets home.

Does anyone else have scatterbrained friends? Well, I ran into Jason once again and he was supposed to bring The Last Samurai to me. Did he? No, but he told me in the gym that he bought it.

Why the fuck do people seem to forget so easily? I go out of my way to do things for people but not many try with me. There are times that I do forget due to not being perfect but I do try. Oh, gawd, do I try!

Editor: "You are, like, so dramatic, you moron!"

Jason spent some of the time spotting me on my bench press so all is fine now. It kept my mind off of my frustration of having to be in the gym with a permanent wedgie and a girl right nearby with that enormous sweat stain up her ass. There are certain "wet spots" guys do not want to see.

So, to cool off, I went to the mall. It's always fun to go on Sundays thanks to a juvenile delinquency place letting the kids shop. Of course, these kids have to have escorts as they walk around in the required blue uniforms. Am I the only one that thinks the pathetic uniforms are not enough? Bring back whippings and beatings so that these kids will have something to brag about.

Kid: "That's nothin'. You think you know pain? One time, an officer decided to put a broken light bulb up my nuts. That's pain, boy, and I asked him to do it again."

Nothing much in the mall to see as I cooled down. The best A/C is in that place so instead of coming home with sweat dripping on my pillow, I just let it fall in different pathetic stores. People in Hot Topic smell pretty bad so I become one with them. Am I the only one that thinks it is mega fuckin' cool to work in a place that lets you wear bandannas?

Editor: "It is a requirement for Hedgehoggy when he enters the gym to wear a bandanna. Not only does he become thug-lite but also a very colorful "G" in that today's attire matched with blue. Word to your mother."

There's a woman at a bookstore that's giving me the skunk eye. I'm assuming that since I'm in there so much she thinks I'm stealing stuff. Whatever. I read and read and read in that store.

This bookstore is nice in that its DVD collection is somewhat obscure. You'll find the Unrated versions of some great flicks that others require "R." Of course, they also carry Playboy and Penthouse DVDs for those that don't like a DVD with dialogue.

I just love to haunt bookstores since I read a bit too much. No coffee or tea, just me and a read. Jason is like this as well since he's given up going out to bars or getting stoned. Oh, I will never forget the time I got waaaaaaaaay stoned with him. Let's just say that I get really, really chatty.

So, all of this rain feels good since temporarily the humidity has calmed. Some people have it real bad with floods. It's just me and my laundry with the sweat of my balls.

Kind of sounds like a poem doesn't it?

- - 2009-07-07

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