My mom is just in a dizzy all due to the chaos my grandma's surgery has now brought. She's packed up to leave whereas I am forced to stay here due to taking care of 5 Yorkies and potential hatchlings of quail. This will take place within 5 days because those eggs are mighty plump.

*I still have no fucking clue as to how we ended up with quail eggs so just don't try to sell crazy here. We're all stocked up.*

In case you don't get it, my cousin's selling of my grandparents' house has my mom forced to stay in a hotel on her visit south. Gee, those cunts sure were smart in putting a damper on our visits, huh? The dogs can no longer go south to see Grandma thanks to all this so that is why it's up to me to take care of everyone of these 5 little mischief makers. Just witness the fact that Ellie-Mae took a dump behind the couch about an hour ago. That's why my mom's secret weapon is kleenex since she is forced to walk around with it in case there is poop. There always is.

Ah, to add to all the recent shitty news, I find out that Nick is leaving. Dammit, I was finally just knowing a good gay friend. Now, I can't be as comfortable in showing my feminine side and will have to resort to scratching my balls and talkin' dirty before 3pm.

That all reminds me of how I meet people and then they just disappear. All of that makes it harder for me to want to know anyone. They just get up and leave eventually. Nick's going home. Joe became a stripper. Harry takes off for 4 months each year to see his family in the Mississippi. Natalie got scared off by the perverted old guy I continue to talk to. I'm not kidding when I told him how uncomfortable I was with the sophomore girl and this came out of his mouth:

"You should keep her on the side. When you get to be old, she'll be young still."

Whatever that means.......gawd, I thought our sex drives will go down. I'm hoping mine will or at least meet someone that matches mine.

Since I love scars, I talked to this really cute girl at Best Buy. She finds it funny how people ask about this enormous line down the right side of her beautiful face. It's when she opens her mouth that my tongue easily rolls back in. Her teeth are awful! Many are rotted and I'm not sure if the point in which I made her laugh got her uncomfortable because the teeth were exposed. I just don't know what to say. Should I ask her out one day or end up talking to her, I'll have to give her a mouth guard. It makes me feel awful to say that but you really can't help but notice the girl's teeth, especially since I brush 2 times a day always.

Brings up a weird question I have:

Ever heard Toby Keith's "Little Whiskey Girl" song? Well, I got to wonderin' what the hell he's talking about because all of the girls I've known that drink whiskey are complete trash. Does he really want a woman that you find passed out on the floor daily? I'm sure it's kind of funny to date a girl that gets drunk once in a while but whiskey sends 'em right flat on the face. You bring your friends over and they're so used to stepping out of the way of your girlfriend completely passed out on the floor.

"Oh, don't mind her. She needs her whiskey so let's play video games after we take the markers to her. I'm drawing a rainbow on my girlfriend's stomach!"

Even my drinkin' buddies draw the line at whiskey. Mark, a guy that drank 100 shots of beer and then several more bottles, was fine. He drank a bottle of whiskey and ended up crying while we carried him wherever he needed to go. I just don't think I could handle a girl on whiskey because they sure don't look like that girl in the video but more like the stuff in backwoods of Arkansas.

So, I just wish I had the enthusiasm to tell my favorite DVDs to own. It's best when you have that feel good energy and all because certain ones just have to be explained with a little oomph. Right now, there is no oomph but more frustrations. Maybe if the quail hatch tomorrow, I'll be all goofy n' stuff. Just don't give me any whiskey or I'll be typing that entry on the keyboard with my dick.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07