-Airplane

Well, I must say that all of these movies, the latest developments in the war on terror, and fears of North Korea's possibly having nukes has me wondering if there will one day be a thermo nuclear war as promised in The Terminator. Wouldn't that be kind of cool since we'd get back to basics?

-No more rappers bragging about their bling bling but actually having to go back to earning it by waiting for little ol' ladies in Compton.

-Paris Hilton? Whatever became of her after a pack of angry Russians with drunken chinamen came in dire need of a place to fight by taking over her mansion? Poor, poor Tinkerbell. You realize that that dog lives better than us?

-Suddenly, CEOs have to actually earn their paycheks by getting into the trenches with us "little people" just to fend off stinky Afghanis.

-Bush is somewhere up in Canada playing with imaginary airplanes complete with sound effects.

Oh, I'm just thinking to myself about all these signs pointing to how there will one day be a giant war. It does scare me but there is this sadist side of me that thinks we need it to start getting ourselves back into a humble mode instead of as the disgusting materialists we are becoming. Sad isn't it?

I don't know about you but I once talked with a Special Forces guy that served in Vietnam. He had seen so much and killed so many of the enemy that there was no way he'd ever want to do it all again. It was in his opinion that war is cruel in how you not only lose a part of yourself but possibly your friends at the hands of enemy. Funny how I don't care about my own death but I would not be able to lose my best friends, especially, Bald-O.

I've got a bit of curiousity about experiencing a war that is just. I'm definitely not talking about the one in Iraq since it was to look for WMD that intelligence lied about. Bush telling us to go up against Saddam because of his supposed harboring of terrorists was a complete lie that over 1,000 American soldiers had to die over!?! Why did we not go into Saudi Arabia or put more of our efforts into Afghanistan?

I know it sounds weird but it's the plain truth that I'm curious about war and have this fear that it will one day take place in the U.S. I'm pretty damn strong and have a great aim so I'll be a strong asset to help defend. I'd just have to stand there and watch Bush haul ass in order for him to run away at the first bullet zinging past as I open fire. This America has become more about what you own rather than what you stand for. Disagree? Well, how come we have a draft dodger for a vice president and a coward for an actual president yet they still have a chance of winning the election?

Of course, some of these thoughts come up thanks to Resident Evil's premise that an airborne virus released into the air will cause people to go into zombie mode by eating people in sight. Yucky! I'd just do what the guys in Shaun Of the Dead did and spend a few hours in the pub getting sloshed so I look like the undead. It's almost like Michael Jackson's "Thriller" but with much worse dance moves.

Slight chuckle of the day:

Someone Googled my diary under "Picture Of Woman Pooping."

I'll never understand guys' need to see women poop or pee. It's totally overrated because they poop like us and can pee like us but with the terrible consequences of hitting their shoes if having to stand completely straight up. Haven't you ever read the classic, "Everybody Poops?" If a girl ever poop'd in front of me, I'd consider divorce or a complete break-up since I like to keep that area as reality free as possible.

Picked up Premiere's newest issue with Angelina Jolie on the cover. Well, for once it wasn't all about Miss Angelina but for the little quip on those pesky Star Wars flicks being released on DVD that so many people are dying to own. Damn myself for not keeping the originals on VHS since they were so much better than that crap Lucas put out in the late 90's. Han shot first, folks.

Interesting fact: The 20th Century Fox guys were most worried about Chewbacca's possibly not wearing pants in Star Wars. They feared that through all that hair, ol' Chewie's schlong might pop out and you know how those Christian's love to picket over a piece of meat.

I'm slowly getting out of my funk, slowly. My grandma's death has slowed me down inside to the point that I feel as if I'm floating throughout each day. My left arm is in a short amount of pain at the lower bicep but I can project it away easily with my own form of numbing. It's weird and I was able to ignore all this with my workout at the gym. The pump I got was a bunch of warm waves flowing throughout my body.

Remember that cute brown-eyed girl I mentioned? Her name is Sarah and she was at the gym right as I walked in. At least I know I am human still since I have a mild crush on her since I just cannot get enough of those big eyes. Sarah's pretty tiny and I'm guessing around 90 pounds but it's the eyes.

Am I the only guy that doesn't accentuate just a girl's ass? I mean, I'd lick the sweat off of it if she's cute but for me, I just like seeing Sarah and talking with her here and there. We both take our workouts seriously to the point that we do what we have to do and rest by chatting. Our schedules have us only meeting in the gym at a rate of once a week.

How do you know if a guy likes a girl?

-He gives her a nickname.

-He glances at her a lot but not a complete stare. Psychos stare and tend to drool as well. Time teaches them to bring their own mop and bucket.

-He tends to hide behind gym equipment thanks to getting boners that are just too obvious. Will occasionally yell out, "Penis, stay down!" Maybe, that's just me.

-He tends to be overdramatic by doing dance moves as he moves to different pieces of gym equipment. Swan Lake is easy. Try anything by Usher and you'll end up with the guys questioning your sexuality no matter how gangsta you look. Oops! Did I give away too much about me?

While driving to class, I realized that most nose pickers that I've seen tend to be female. I'm wondering why since ladies tend to spend more time in the loo, you'd expect them to get their diggin' done there rather than wait for the green light.

Advice: If you decide to read 2 books this year, read Paris Hilton's and "Everybody Poops." They seem to go together, no?

Alright, that's enough from moi. As you can see, I am slowly getting out of my funk. I'm still dog tired emotionally and all but at least I have things to dwell on. Pictures will be sent tomorrow to Sara, a haircut to get some of this spiked treeline chopped down, and the hope that someone with actual sense will not come to this diary in hopes that there are pictures of women tinkling. I'd sure as hell think that watching a horse peeing would suffice since my life long achievement is to match that kind of length of peeing. I'm such an amateur since I can barely fill a coffee cup. Goodnight.

- - 2009-07-07

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