In some ways I feel as if I live in Florida to prepare for the onslaught of Hurricane Jeanne (making her debut on Sunday morning). I'm here and there preparing for winter clothes even if it is still quite warm. My love of thermal knits has given me the drastic excuse to get 3 all in different colors, white, grey, and black (but of course!). It's my love of dressing nicely in the colder months that sets me apart since I've grown so tired of my usual A&F baggy cargo shorts and a t-shirt with some kind of caption full of "interesting" intentions.

Oh, I have my own drama, baby. I still have not figured out all my little abilities of this new cell-phone that I just got. It makes me feel so out of date as well as a hyporcrite since I hate them. Hate them! You'll drive anywhere and some jackass is on his/her cell talking about shit that really doesn't need to be dealt with.

Alas, I have a cell with all these weird little things that are pretty much unnecessary but fun. I can fetch my email, take pictures, send text, and so many other little do-dads that I've lost count. I've become one of "them" and I despise myself.

"Oh, let me check my cell if I can fit you in."

Grrr. I did learn how to text, today. Later on, I will be adding the ability to visit the web to learn how to visit sites by peering into this tiny little image. One thing I know I want to do is learn how to take pictures so I can save them as screen savers. I get 36 shots. How many can you do?

However, I am not taking my new little gadget along for the ride. Why do I sound like a woman with a vibrator out on a mission to sloppy up the "sword?" I'll be using my mom's cell in case of my car breaking down while swerving to avoid a tractor or 2. My hope is that I end up at a farmer's place for a night but find out his daughter is Keira Knightley and she's looking for ride in the hay. A night like that will bear no sleep.

So, Bald-O's is my destination, once again, for the usual let's-get-drunk-and talk-funny. Our conversations are really on the bizarre end but we don't care. I'm used to a guy with a shaved head drinking over 15 bottles of beer all while trying to insert some chew in his mouth while we start to slur. It's part of males with bad habits that should be avoided by females.

As funny as we are, I'm sure I'll get into it with Bald-O on my grandma's death. He didn't meet this one but there was one that went along for a ride down south. Bald-O and I are strong on families our grandmas' deaths hurt pretty bad even if I'm not showing much of signs on this.

It's funny to me since I'm meeting Bald-O at this festival taking place in the school he teaches at. My mom warned me not to wear a t-shirt with anything funkiness in slogans. No "I Love Lesbians" or "Grab Your Balls! We're Going Bowling!" Kids are so impressionable these days.

The news on my little dog, Jethro, is just so-so. He's moving around more in his kennel at the vet's place but nothing spectacular. The major thing is that Jethro has been able to hold food in without throwing up this time! Gawd, at 3.6 pounds, he needs all the cheeseburgers he can get. I miss my little buddy.

On the other hand, my other dog of 5, Buffy, has really been getting close to me. She'll nudge me as I walk down the hall to get my attention or order me to get down on the floor to roll around with her. I'm a sucker for a girl with hair all over her face, huh?

I'm not sure why but the gym tonight was quiet, very quiet. Will and Jody were there but no Brianne. Whoo! At the rate she's going with me, I'm pretty happy. A 16 year old with that kind of body does all kinds of things to guys in my gym with a raging amount of testosterone. Let's just say that I'm protective of Brianne since we've become friends so I don't like it when guys try to look up her shorts.

As I said before, I don't know how the fuck I'd be able to deal with losing my virginity at the age of 14 as Brianne did. All I remember of myself at that age was of complete mentally incompetent for the love of a Twinkie. In other words, just the littlest thing was too big for even me to handle.

My high school girlfriend was named Beth, a tennis player at a rival high school. She was cute with those tiny tennis skirts and little white shoes but with a mother I clashed with. Ugh, I hated that woman! Anyway, Beth wanted me to have sex with her on her waterbed while her parents were away. Here is what you will never hear from a guy:

"I don't believe in premarital sex."

I know I slap myself in the head on this but I now look back at it as a good thing. We all know I lost my virginity to an amazing woman that really changed my views on everything that 19 became a turning point.

When I picture myself having sex with Beth, I see a guy that is as lost as a truck driver in Victoria's Secret. I would not have a clue as to how to make love. None. I saw no pornos in life even if I knew the female anatomy thanks to anatomy books, Hustler, Cherry, Playboy, and Penthouse. Nothing comes close to learning how to please that female swelling when it comes to a jock that doesn't even understand his own dick.

So, I finally give up when it comes to Kristan's long talk with me on so many different sexual topics. Yes, we discussed women's sexuality, religious beliefs (Yucky!), and how the body was made to be used for kink. In other words, I got a lesson on Skankology and ended up with an "A."

Why do I find myself so happy that I lost my virginity to Kristan at the age of 19 rather than at 16?

-Kristan brought with her a new way of thinking that cleared me of all that crap I learned in private Catholic school. You know........."Women what want sex are nothing but whores! thing? Next time you see a nun, smack her with a ruler but that could just be a turn-on.

-Kristan taught me well on the vagina. I was schooled from a woman that lay on her back with her legs completely open so that I learn where all the little pleasure zones are, the names of each part, how to please/tease, and other little secrets that I'm not at liberty to discuss. I'm not saying I am a great lover but someone that is willing to learn good actual fun/kinky/loving sex.
-Kristan understood my need to have a hands on experience with the vagina by allowing me a hell of a lot of little experiments. Every chance I got, I got to finger and lick. Hell, Kristan wanted me to grasp my curiousity of the female anatomy and how was I to say no? Would another girl do that?
-We'd stay up all night so Kristan could help me study for my Finals. Yes, sex helps at all hours.
-Spending a complete weekend without any clothes and just fucking all day/night cannot be beat. Kristan had music playing forever as we went at it. Beth had a waterbed and a 30 minute time period til her parents came home. Which was better?

- - 2009-07-07

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