Well, I must say that scouring the aisles of a toystore may be some 8 year old's wet dream but for me, at 3am, I look at my hands full of cuts to wonder how I got through another day. Funny thing is that I'm not complaining since I enjoy scars, a part of life's many good/bad memories, but when you get a piece of cardboard shoved up your fingernail, that, my friends, is pain.

I'm not sure what the fuck happened or I'm just plain clumsy because I was pushing a giant piece of cardboard when it came out directly up my right hand's index finger's fingernail. Hurts like hell to type but I trek on..........

So, I somehow wake my sleepy ass up to find that my home's hot water has been turned off or something. A half-way full bathtub of cold water just would not cut it so I stood there on the bathroom's floor getting the 'portant parts fresh for my soon to be gym attendance. This is not funny but I'm laughing at the fact that my brother found this out in the hardest way with a VERY cold shower.

For all those with shitty or cold plumbing, I feel you. No, I feeeeeeeeel you.

My odd day doesn't end there. Remeber Brianne's friend, all 16 years of her? Well, she had the amazing confidence to ask me if my cock was pierced thanks to a discussion on them with Brianne. I'm sure the prudes working out nearby enjoyed listening to my explanation of how no piece of metal will ever go towards the most precious of sensitive organs. Nothing gets me startled more than dwelling on the possibility of pain down there.

I'm sure many people would disagree with 16 year old girls talking about penises but I'm actually for all this so hear me out. We guys would always discuss boobs, ass, and that lovely pink part so why not girls. It's like any discussion with girls is supposed to have sexual knowledge be left out. I'm pretty sure girls discuss penis size and looks. Remember the movie 16 Candles and that note scene?

"Did you touch it?"

I laughed my ass off when the girl gave the answer of "almost" and then Jake (yes, THAT Jake) found the note. Only in the 80's could you have a teenage love story and end up with a drunken Chinaman.

Well, I'm awaiting my boss's proposal that was yesterday night. Doug, with a $200 bottle of Cristal, decided that was the night to ask his girlfriend to marry him. According to him, there was no way for her to say no. My boss, a goofy guy with a similar sense of humor to mine, with a wife? Oh, how it brings me confidence that I could also find myself married but with a house full of comic books, novels, CDs, video games, DVDs, and the ultimate entertainment room devoted to those that have lost faith with our world today.

It's like what Xander, the character from the movie, XXX, said: Don't take away our violent video games and movies. It's the only education we've got.

Oh, Veronica, can I ask for a small request, please? It seems that you might be able to help me with Battle Royale, a movie banned from the U.S. due to our high morales. Silly me. Bush's need to make America a home for rich CEOs.

- - 2009-07-07

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