-Avril Lavigne

Well, I must say that I have had a hell of a day that found me in a sweaty gymnasium, a sweaty gym, and my own sweaty room. What's wrong with this picture? Well, due to the rains previously, the outside was fucking cold. You thought I'd put "a cold as a witch's tit" in there didn't ya?

There is nothing like looking out into the night's sky with your favorite furry little friend, Buffy for me, and watching her bark at every little thing that goes by. Birds in the trees? Buffy just wants to let everyone know she's got her eye on you. Starting trouble in my neighborhood? The neighborhood watch program starts with the 4-legged variety after 6pm.

It's so nice to hear that there are other people out there in sharing my love/hate relationship with my gym's elliptical machine, "The Beast." I'm always on the Number 2 version without handle bars to push since it seems to call my name once I'm done with my workout. My ass thanks me for what the pain I have put myself through and, yes, I have no problems with anyone looking at it.

Perhaps, we should start a ring here on Diaryland for all those that have been tortured by our elliptical machines. They are not for the faint of heart since I, too, could barely go for more than 2 minutes when I first started. Alas, I love a good challenge so I didn't give up. I'm now at Level 4 for a good 12 minutes total.

I'll give you my workout, folks. This all takes place after about 45 minutes of weight-lifting. Yeah, I'm a big boy as when Sara, my girlfriend, mentioned about my chest. I just love it when she glides that massage lotion all over....oops...we're talking about something else.

I'm not on the elliptical machine as much as you, Cookie, for I go at a time of 10 minutes at Level 4. As soon as I have finished this, I move on to a treadmill for 6 minutes of brisk walking. Once that is over, I find myself on the elliptical for the last 2-3 minutes. Why? My body is confused and will be working overtime due to the fast-slow-fast changes. This all makes it work harder and those last 2-3 minutes are hell as a result!

What I've noticed is that I enjoy variety in my cardio. I'll switch things around here and there so my body doesn't get bored. I'll always do the elliptical thanks to the challenge each session provides and how great it makes me feel as a drenched me makes his way to change in the locker room. Remember that this is all after a weight session and 170 reverse sit-ups. Sound difficult? Not for me. It's "The Beast" that takes what I have left but the feeling afterward is so worth it.

Interesting day at a job fair in my old college's gymnasium. Nothing really that catches my eye due to basic summer work. Arrrgh! Makes me wonder why I even bothered to go to college since so many people with degrees are barely even making it. Thieves, liars, and evil people seem to get the highest paying jobs here in town thanks to some major corruption going on.

However, I did run into an old friend from a different college that I used to work out with. We'd run the track and various other things to keep ourselves chiseled after downing too many beers on Thursdays. Bree and I instantly recognized each other after so many years so it was hoot to chat with her.

Oh, it was such a ego burst to find that Bree was quite the flirt with me. After all those years away, I guess I turn out to be something she's into but I had to politely mention somewhere that I have a girlfriend. It's such a different situation after being single for a year but I like it. It kind of hurt to see how disappointed Bree looked but I'm happy. Sara gets a little bit of a hit on while she's in Indiana and I like that. None of us are each other's property but Sara and I are happy.

Not surprisingly, I miss Sara. She's sick with a cold so I hate it that I'm here while she's sniffling and sneezing as I should be around doing what boyfriends should be doing. Feet rubs, naked cartwheels, changing TV channels, giving oral sex, and asking her how many fingers I have behind my back. Those types of things.

Oh, it's nice that I have a request for an entry about my love of vaginas. Vagina, vagina, vagina! Am I the only one that loves that word? You see, I just love words that start with "V" so not surprisingly, "vixen" and "villian" are in there, too.

Long time readers know of an entry I did on my love of vaginas. I'd definitely love to read one from girls on penises but that's not the point. It's just that we should all love every little part we were given and to not think of them as "obscene" or "gross" as religions or laws seem to point to them as. Geez, you'd think that if a girl opened her legs, people would suddenly die. Only happens when Star Jones does that.

Editor: "That woman is disgusting!"

You'd think that society doesn't really care about vaginas. I mean, we get all these commercial devoted to men's inability to achieve erections when it's probably their own faults of overeating and smoking. Funny how you see a woman look into the camera and talk about her husband's penis as a toy.

"Larry couldn't get it up so I was forced to get him a little blue pill. He felt so bad while eating that massive amount of steak while I was underneath the table trying desperately to get hard as I orally serviced him."

If you've noticed, I don't use the word "pussy" since I hate it. The words itself generally means "weak" and I sure as hell don't find vaginas to be that way. They helped push us out into this fucked up world after spending 9 months trying to feed ourselves through some kind of tube. Funny how we are then spanked so the damn process of kinkiness starts here.

Vaginas are gorgeous, pink lips and all! What makes them such a delicacy of amusement is how we don't even really see them. There nestled in between a pair of legs is the place that has toppled armies and caused the downfall of many men. Just the slightest hint of that sensitive female flesh makes me go weak all because of how mysterious they are. Nobody wants to devote books to penises but everyone wants to show vaginas.

What do I love about the vagina? Well, I love how the look, pink lips that swell when aroused. It's so loving to insert my fingers slowly when in a heavy arousal build-up leading to mad sex. The most I have ever inserted was 2 but that's not a big issue. It's how guys talk about who's feels more "loose." Geez, you'd think that maybe their dicks were quite small or that they'd entered a cave or something.

One thing I am obsessed about is what happens when the vagina is aroused. *I almost feel like I'm talking about a seperate creature here* That wetness that I have called "nourishment" "juices" "life force" or "drink" just shows you how much I love to be on my knees licking. Boys don't realize how the effort you put in will be paid back big time since she'll be more loving to the cock while drowning in orgasms.

Fingering is a sweet, sweet moment that is like a siren's call to wayward sailors. The more I do it, the more I want to do more or go deeper, even til death. I like passionate fingering where you kiss deeply and just letting your hands/fingers roam. My absolute favorite is to rub the back of my hands to feel that "panty puddle" that formed prior. Told ya I loved wetness.

What is amusing to me is how males are allowed to be gynos. I'm not a sexist but I just believe that due to so many mysteries of the vagina (we are still debating g-spots and there are males that still think women pee from here), men have no fucking clue as to what goes on down there. Periods are considerably scary at the point that just picking up box of tampons causes a nervous breakdown. I know. I was once one of these guys.

Funny how my doctor is female as I say this. It's the moment where another woman holds my balls and tells me to cough that just has a weird kick to it. Getting jiggly with it has a whole new meaning when my doctor has cold hands.

I don't know how to explain it any further, my fascination with vaginas. Being a weird 5th Grader that took out books to figure out why I got a major boner while looking at Dad's Playboys is what started it all. Not only are they beautiful but they have this warmth as my cock is inserted. That gentle thrusting that slowly builds up as I find that little "spot" she wants me to hit is what makes things get more interesting. My favorite is to be ridden "cowgirl style" and that's not much of a surprise since she gets more control.

I'll admit there are days I have no interest in sex, namely when I have a horrible cold or a nasty events filled period of time. However, I never stop thinking about curling up completely naked with my girlfriend and touching her to let her know I'm thinking with my filthy mind as I look into her eyes. I love sex and how it tends to soothe even if I am more of a pleaser.

So, I hope that gets you a good idea as to what I love about vaginas, the feeling, the wetness, the scent, and the mysteriousness. It's such an arousing time when you first feel her up while kissing isn't it? Just get hot n' nasty with your lover. Spank and be heard!

Random:

-I'm getting addicted to watching that Movie House thing on MTV in which the cameras follow the making of House Of Wax. The actors and actresses may be as dumb as a pile of shit but it's still fun to watch these spoiled morons do something. That Chad guy from One Tree Hill has a real masculine issue and I hate him. Elisha Cuthbert is the only actress worth watching. Paris Hilton just sucks and I hope she gets run over someday.

-The OC is so fucking addictive. Am I the only one that enjoys it for the parents, Sandy and Kristen? Peter Gallagher is hilarious when given a mic to sing or auction off items. I've only missed 1 episode this season and kick myself for it. Too bad that lesbian issue was resolved so lightly and without more girl on girl action, the secret to a guy's heart besides a good meatloaf.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07