- "Manic Monday" by The Bangles

It's Friday night! Why the hell are you at home reading my diary at that time!?! Are you at home showing boobies n' booger movies to young impressionable boys? Passing the time playing Solitaire thanks to being stood up on a date? Or are you just lost in your thoughts that you tend to lose track of the time?

Me? My friend was a jar of peanut butter just a short while ago. Jiff did a great job of combining peanut butter with honey. Just grab a spoon and eat it right out of the jar with Hedgie! We'll trade insults back and forth as we loose ourselves to the goodness in a manic cream form. Choosey Hedgehoggy chooses Jiff.

Yeah, just been sleepy all day. Not sure if it's the allergies at this time of year or what but I came seriously close to falling asleep in the bathtub after a short workout. These ol' eyes of mine kept falling and falling til I definitely had to get out. Ever seen Nightmare On Elm Street where Nancy falls asleep in the tub? Freddy never gave me the handjob I was wishing for.

There was hardly anyone in my gym. Even Nick wasn't there so I pretty much kept to myself. The local colleges are pretty much done so all the usual sorority girls have gone back home to terrorize their mothers with just where the letters are ending up when it comes to clothes or tattoos. The fraternity guys will no longer walk into my gym consisting of a mixture of Absolute and OJ. Just the locals and I be fine with that.

The workout itself was so dull thanks to not talking to anyone. I just sat there on the incline press here and there while wishing the usual arrogant bodybuilders would just leave. I hate them! Of course, I've mentioned Nick but there are a few more that have me wondering where they get these thoughts of how amazing they are.

So, I tried to dwell on other things instead of having to listen to guys laughing about the latest sports mishaps or playoffs in the NBA (my faves are gone-76ers and Nuggets). These guys think of nothing but trivial aspects or stare at girls bending over. You should have seen the stares when the strippers attempted to workout. It was like a 21 gun salute but you'd have to look a little lower.

I'm so happy that I've only had the mistake of getting wood in my gym just one time. *knocks on wood*

"Just where are the people?" was what I asked myself. Jeez, it's like there was a massive party but no one told me. Either that or all the cars coming in the parking lot as I walked out was at a point that now that I'm gone they'll all come in. I'm guessing that Brianne's getting a job is a sign of how things just change.

Even after dinner, I almost fell asleep while watching my Ghost In the Shell TV Series Vol. 4. I'm even boring myself as my little dog, Buffy, continues to belt out her love for the neighbor's dog. There is nothing like a little Yorkshire Terrier dying for a bit o' that meat missile hanging from a black Labrador. My dog just likes her boys big, real big.

Yesterday, I did talk to one of my friends that just so happens to be in high school. Yeah, I know how it sounds so strange but these high school girls actually have a sense of fun while I'm in workout mode. Brianne may only show up once in a while due to her waitressing job but my fellow OC addict fills in from time to time.

Prom. Oh, it's that time for this town where girls look either really fucked up in shiny dresses or guys like me crash the car only to have our dates drive in high heels. Yeah, Beth, my high school sweetheart, drove and I still cringe when I remember telling the story to her late grandmother. Prom stories, anyone? Did you end up in a hotel room with her legs in the air? Not me. I was a good boy, so different than now.

I know our prom changed at some point. Your car was to be searched once you pull up. I'm not sure who ruined it back in my day but I've got a tiny inkling which of my fellow graduates was possibly a bit tipsy. Again, not me. I was a good boy til after high school, corrupted by alcohol and sex.

- - 2009-07-07

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