-"Ava Adore" by The Smashing Pumpkins

First things first, I found myself watching the Lost Season Finale all because I was hoping to find anything remotely interesting about the show to see why my parents were so hooked onto it. My mom would tell me that she couldn't wait to see the next episode of whatever one she had seen while my dad just does what he does best, sit there blankly.

Nothing. I found that an hour and a half of time was wasted. No monster. No clear explanation as to what these people were doing on this Island. No reason for the numbers. Ugh, even my parents were quite disappointed in a show that you would swear would lead up to an interesting conclusion.

FYI: I was washing my mom's car so that's why I missed the first 30 minutes of Lost. It was a good washing, too, so I don't feel like I missed a thing.

Damn, I'm disappointed in ABC for what they did. I had been reading interviews with the creaters on hints of what will happen in the Season Finale of Lost but nothing of what they said would happen. I'll admit that I was mostly curious about the monster but they played it like the morons they are. You only see Locke dragged and a pit made to carry him down to his death.

Now, if you had seen the best way to handle a season finale like I did, you'd have watched Veronica Mars's. Man, we had so much going on and a surpise as to who killed Veronica's best friend. Totally out of the blue and so on the edge of my seat was what that episode did to me. The creators did not play with my feelings and added wit, creativity, and humor while Lost just rolled over and let out a small fart.

So, to anyone that is going to make a case on Lost's Season Finale, I'm curious as to whether it held up interest with you. Not with this boy.

*Makes raspberry sounds*

My mother, one of the loveliest women on this earth also has an interesting vocabulary. She's been talking about balls and assholes. "Balls" as in testicles and "assholes" as in actual places that poop.

This interesting addition to my mother's vocabulary has come from her feeling the need to comment on Ellie-Mae's asshole as she walks by. By the way, there are no naked people bending over for I am talking about 1 of my 5 Yorkshire Terriers. Work with me, dammit!

Ellie-Mae has 2 weird dark spots right around her asshole. *I'm actually laughing as I type this because it just sounds so awkward on Diaryland* My mother decides to point this out right before dinner, some seasoned chicken and baked fries. So, the next 20 minutes were where she and I got into a discussion on just what the spots on Ellie-Mae's asshole could be.

Editor: "I'm sure enquiring minds want to know."

The curse of what my mother did in discussing assholes is that I now seem to find the need to stare at Ellie-Mae's ass when I take the dogs outside to poop. The spots could be some kind of sun-spots or moles. This has got to stop since, once you get a question in me, I've got this insane mind to know the answer.

As for balls, my mother and I laugh about how Clyde's are gigantic. Sometimes, they are called "grapes" but I'm not sure which one of us got that creative. You see, Jeopardy was on while dinner was being made. It could just be the smell of chicken in the air that results in 2 people talking about balls and assholes.

Come to think of it, it is kind of funny how comfortable I am with talking to my mother like that. It used to be that I would try my best to get her to change the subject. Now, I just realize that my mom is so colorful.

My gym was so quiet and I think this was due to people having Lost Season Finale parties. I'm curious if this is the case because I'd love to hear their interpretations as to whether they were as disappointed as my parents and I. Either people from my gym were watching or the local baseball games were in play since Will wasn't in their. Wish I was playing.

Ah, but Kim and I got into a conversation that got me to learn a little about her life outside of the gym, gardening. My mother used to do that but she decided it best that all flowers should go through capital punishment. Now, our backyard once looked like a warzone but my dad and I got rid of her relics demonstrating this.

I'm getting the new questions that come up from people that I knew I'd get:

-"How's your girlfriend?"
-"Going to Indiana this weekend?"
-"So, she bit you again, huh?"

Word travels fast in a gym but it's good for others since girlfriend conversations are instant ice-breakers. Wonder if Sara gets these as well....

Other than that, I'd like to say that I am one of the few people that get the director, Wes Anderson. Many people I know did not like The Royal Tennenbaums but I found it quietly funny. What I am watching is his latest DVD, The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou.

The humor in Life Aquatic....is so subtle and quiet but I like it. Certain scenes don't wait for you to laugh but find it in your own mind to do so. The ship is quite a source of humor if you look at it closely as Steve hunts for the legendary Jaguar Shark that ate his friend. You'll get 2 confused dolphins, a wife on the rocks, a topless crew member, pirates, a clingy William Defoe that wants to be on the "A" team, and a part-gay rival. Sounds weird? It just depends on your taste in humor.

So, I have no clue as to who won America Idol because the only reason for it is to put it on captions and sing along like karaoke. In case you don't know, all people that first set foot in Bald-O's trailer on his 40 acres of land must sing a song. Mine was "Love Shack" but you can do an American Idol one to warm-up. Either that or you'll have to listen to me take a turned on mic and do my best interpretation of Axl Rose in "Welcome To the Jungle."

So, I am outta here to finish up Life Aquatic. My DVDs are viewed chapters at a time since I'm all over the place. I'm awfully curious about the Jaguar Shark since I just hate false promises. At least, Veronica Mars is back on during the summer to show 'em how it's done. Goodnight.

- - 2009-07-07

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