-Alice (my old 8th Grade crush told me this and I never forgot thanks to how easy it is and to the point.)

See the big spelling bee on ESPN? I highly doubt it thanks to how weird it would feel even if I was clenching my hands in hope that little Billy will be able to spell "worm" or "abracadabra." Not surprisingly, the winner of this amazing competition was not nationally one of us.

I'm not an arrogant American in saying that our country is so amazingly better and all that but I can't help but be dumbfounded at how other countries beat us in math, science, and now a fucking spelling bee!?! While our kids' test scores drop by the 6th Grade, kids in other countries are just getting warmed up.

Britney Spears: "That, like, sucks."

Wouldn't it be great if we actually honored smarts and shamed stupidity? We'd be able to get rid of a lot of people we are forced to read about by forcing them to wisen up as our paid abusers throw smushy apples at the likes of Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and Donald Trump. Suddenly, People Magazine would have no one to put on their cover but actual people that have something to say.

I'm sure there would be a small percentage of idiots that just have to know what Tom Cruise has to say about the evil of psychologists but who cares? He's not quite done with eating Katie Holmes but we'll get back to him on that.

It tends to bother me that we have no shame. None. People with no class or dignity are given millions of dollars just to help dumb down our world while people that actually know something are forced to just scrape by. Being a teacher is hard when your students' only desire is to become "pimps" as told by a student in my former high school. I tell ya that listening to my former teachers telling me how bad it is is a laugh all to itself when I should feel a form of sadness.

To do an entry on the dumbing down of society is pretty damn tough since there are so many ways you can go about it. You've got corrupt priests thinking that they have a right to force people to vote their way. Music has become more about how you look than what your lyrics say. Kids still don't know that you should look both ways before crossing a street. Innocense is lost since I've read that an 8 year old got pregnant and it's not shocking to anyone else!?! Where's Big Bird when you need him?

I've done an entry on common sense so the fact that we have no shame is nothing new. Everyone thinks that they have a gimmick while being dumb. Jessica Simpson is a perfect example in how she presents herself, no talent or smarts but rich while her husband clings to the money coming in. Please, say no 98 Degrees reunion, Nick.

So, I come back from the gym, just as grumpy as I went in. I'm not the type to watch much TV but the premise of Beauty And the Geek on WB sounded amusing. They put a bunch of male geeks with some of the dumbest women (mostly models that "like to shop") I've ever seen:

"Where's Russia?"

"Didn't Columbus discover America in 1942?"

What was so heartwarming was seeing these guys have to work with the girls all while concealing their nervousness and, boy, were they nervous. Some of them talked about not ever being on a date or even having a girl talk to them. One was a self-proclaimed virgin and so scared to talk to the girls. 1 barely stayed in the room long enough to introduce himself. I wasn't laughing at the geeks social skills but found it charming.

I've been nervous at talking to only a few girls because at some point after high school, I just said, "Fuck it." Everyone's human and, well, I want to have fun knowing people. Girls can be so mysterious and confusing but guys can be as well.

The last time I was ever nervous in talking to a girl was last year. It was something new because I had never felt that way thanks to college life of being surrounded by them. Lo and behold, I was barely able to talk thanks to a massive crush on Elizabeth all that summer. Various sentences come out with:

"Bhtths so, we flposho sow?"

"Caow ju wanta do dat swilly run on tweadmill?"

At some point, I'm sure I was hoping various guns would be pointed at me and I would be full of ammunition. It's like I've always said to describe the feeling within myself. I can talk to anyone no matter how beautiful. It's when it comes to the girl I am so interested in that she becomes so impossibly amazing in my eyes that I just cannot concentrate all due to a weird fear in how I made her too good for me. Got it? Put another way:

"She's gonna laugh at me! I am now a troll and must go back underneath my bridge and eat raisins before the cats steal them."

Elizabeth did come back around March for her Spring Break. Not surprisingly, the sentence structures were completely intact as I sat next to her on the bench. No confused looks from Elizabeth so I had a great time talking about Sara while she told me about her boyfriend. It's all in the head.

Hell, I remember my first dance in 8th Grade. My mom dropped me off that Friday night. What I wore was a large red sweater Bugle Boy cargo-like pants. Oh, the horror as the girls were on 1 side and the boys on the other. It took a long time til a couple actually made it onto the dance floor. Just who would dance with a stylistically challenged boy like me and no dance moves thanks to being completely underage from alcohol? Alice.

FYI: There was no dirty dancing of any kind since we in private Catholic school had to "leave a place for the Lord. Good thing for the girls since they wouldn't have to deal with DFEs (Dance Floor Erections).

Do I understand girls? No. Do I even try? I've been taking Alice's advice since high school. Am I shy of girls? Nope, but I do get that once in a while one. Then again, I am not single so there is no issue there. I'll just say that I describe my social skills as being if you want to talk to me, do so. I'm not stuck-up or mean but I tend to be in my own world thanks to this one being so fucked up every year. Funny how I get a lot of high fives and waves from girls that know my personality. If only they had seen me in a large red sweater and tacky fashion sense shaking my little butt from side to side while clapping to MC Hammer.

Soup Nazi: "No dates for you!"

I've been grumpy all day and continue to be. This all brings about a never ending headache of worries or possible snapping back at questions. My mother keeps asking me when I am leaving to Indiana over and over. All I can say is, "early evening."

That's all I can say since I need to slap myself back into my old goofy self. With the rain and my grumpiness, this is nearly impossible. Allergies make me sleepy all day while the little elves keep hammering away in my head. Boys are so weird and knowing this is half the battle. Goodnight.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07