-M.I.A.

Interesting. I became pleasantly surprised to find that several people in the U.K. have picked up me for a favorite read. I'm so loving it because it's been a thing of mine to read British media due to my easiness of knowing the slang. As I said before, you really should learn it due to how hilarious it sounds when speaking to fellow Americans.

So, what's on my mind besides the fact that a few of my DVDs located in my vast collection of close to 2,000?

*I have since taken it upon myself to move my favorite DVDS into a more safe and pleasant spot for them*

I was thinking about why we sleep with people. Now, I'm not talking sex and such but the event afterwards. Why do we do it? Is it a courtesy to let that someone know that after bonking them silly that you desire to still be with them? Is it the fact that you girls have not untied the poor guy? Is the girl passed out in a pile of her own drool after 15 mind blowing orgasms?

I don't know about you but I enjoy sleeping with whomever I had sex with. There is just something heavenly about your body being completely relaxed and in such close proximity. Let's just say that the skin is warmly inviting.

I've never forgotten how girls sleep so differently. Kristan and I rarely cuddled and would immediately sleep on opposite sides of the bed. I'm guessing we had no choice since we did it at least 12 times a night and, yes, that is the plain truth of what happens when a 29-year-old woman takes a 19-year-old's virginity. By the time we got to that last round, I was shooting saw dust outta my dick.

Sara got me to thinking about the lore of sleeping with someone because she mentioned how I talked in my sleep on the last visit. It amused me since only my male roommates ever mentioned this due to the old college days of having to share rooms no matter what. It was interesting to also note that Sara wasn't sleeping at the time so she just decided to watch me, something I do as well.

Now, I'm not shy to admit in my love of sleeping next to whomever has made me so completely relaxed. I mean, this is what happens to me after sex, my body just feels like it's floating and I can easily zonk out, something that tends to happen when I am forced to listen to another Paris Hilton interview that brings about how little she thinks.

Do I enjoy watching girls sleep? Sure, it's fun to see how each has their own way of finally relocating from this world. Kristan would sleep face up on the opposite side. M would be on her side to the right at all times. Jen was almost always in the fetal position. Obviously, there are more but I don't care much for those girls. Sara? Well, like me, she tosses around.

Of course, sleeping with someone is dangerous and, no, I am not talking about the males in Japan whom have their dicks cut off if their women find out they have cheated. Yes, it is something they do there as women take a sleeping male to snip and feed it to the ducks.

It's our ability to let our guards down while sleeping next to our sex partners. Scary? In some ways thanks to talking in our sleep that may tell more than we wish but also passing gas. Not many girlfriends of mine will tilt to the side to let them rip but they sure as hell seem to save them for a time spent in bed with me. I've pretty much heard each girlfriend's toot at some time as it helps me giggle.

Editor: "Giggling is good."

I just find it funny how MTV talks of The Real World as keeping it real but try sleeping next to a girl that's had o' bit of Taco Bell and you get the idea. That is far more real than Puck's booger picking.

In no way am I dissing because I just find it amusing how fun it is to share a bed with someone after some serious bonking. Cuddling? Of course! I love it but at some point, I am gonna pass out like Whitney Houston on the pot after a long day of Burger King.

I've mentioned that I snore. So many people have told me of this as my college roommate's ex-girlfriend once told me that along with the fact that I let out a huge fart that woke everyone up into a mass hysteria of laughter. Apparently, no one woke me up to tell as I'm sure they all pointed at me with their mean judgemental fingers of doom. Sometimes, I miss my college roommates as we had some amazing sleepovers with the girls next door since we all got pretty close through those years.

I'm pretty sure I sleep better when Sara's body's warmth is right there next to me. I've got this notion that she's got an automatic sensor in which she will be completely asleep yet still curl up real close. Life is so much better if you sleep naked with the one you just bonked into a dream-state.

Speaking of that, I remember an old "Calvin & Hobbes" comic strip where Calvin asked Hobbes why we sleep. His answer was that the 2 of them will be in each other's dreams to continue their playing. Don't you love the innocense in that, something from a little kid that reminds you of the good times when 'jammies were worn forts were built?

I've never figured out why people would just fuck and then leave. It's just not in me as I've never left the side of every girl I've slept with. You may think I talk in a raunchy way but I'm really a complete hard-bodied teddy guarding Sara. It's just that my body will be off-duty and playing with her in her dreams.

So, why do we sleep with the person we just had sex with? Is it sexual courtesy? Too tired to go home? You've got more fun things to do such as watch each other dress, cuddle in the morning, girls can play with morning wood (it seems to be a stickler), or compare who has the worst morning breath as Sara and I do.

I'm outta here to dwell on the arrival of a package from Miami thanks to Summer. Why our television station decided to air the local basketball game instead of Veronica Mars is dumb. Nobody messes with my girl as she helps nail a killer. Hope you don't fart tonight. Oh, and pictures are soon........very soon. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07