-From Here To Eternity

Well, if you are going to go outside and cruise the bars, be my guest. It is hella nasty as the arctic cold has reached us. 4 days of icy horror are predicted while tomorrow is the worst of all. 1 degree at night while 20 degrees as the highest. Is it any wonder why I'm slowly getting cranky again?

Bill Maher on Jay Leno last night? There is a god and it is he, the big nosed outspoken and proud of being a pot toker. Why is it the sight of Bill gets me all giddy or even to wish my girlfriend could have a romp in the bed with him? Hot monkey love to kill the cold!

I'm pretty sure that I'm allowed a good 24-hour romp with Keira Knightley as I have done my investigation in regards to the whole Vanity Fair fiasco. There's been quite a lot of press on her posing with Scarlett Johansson which can be viewed thanks to the newsstands. Our Barnes & Noble sold out while Borders has quite a lot available. I'm pretty sure Waldenbooks is sold out here since the usual trophy wives tend to shop while the husbands sit on the comfy chairs provided for their boring asses.

Of course, I have my 2 copies in which 1 is tore up due to my Keira collage needing another fix while the other is just kept bagged up and for future use. Yes, there some informative articles, one in which we learn what happened to that Hobie kid from Baywatch. Hint: He's on Myspace, that place where people with nothing to say but wanting to be noticed, like,..........so bad.

I've dabbled a bit on Myspace and found it completely superficial. No offense while I'm sure there are interesting people but it feels so creepy. To put up pictures so much and to show videos of your love life is just too much. Their comments page that is somewhat similar to our notes is full of dumb comments.

"You go, girl!"
"'sup?"
"You look so good."

Whatever. My shock was what I discussed in the last entry. There are hundreds of 12-17-year-old girls barely holding anything back when it comes to their bodies. No nudity is allowed but you can show a lot of flesh hence why there are so many topless poses with arms hiding nipples or thong shots. Whatever happened to class? Gone like yesterday's fart.

That all reminds me as well how much I hate how our investigators are forced to work their asses off to find yet another missing blonde girl in a foreign country. On 20/20, while my dog played on the floor in front of me, there was a segment on a blonde girl that disappeared while being a hostess in Japan. What does it take to get through to these morons that you do not get into a car with any guy (ANY GUY!) that you don't know. Sure, Japanese guys are tiny and look so innocent that you'd pat them on the heads but when you are drugged up and in chains, it aint so much fun anymore.

Our youth is just stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Paris Hilton is someone to look up to? Isn't it wonderful how Jessica Simpson can barely add or subtract? Lindsay Lohan has a traffic accident but MTV is more worried about how she is than the person she hit? Girls taunting sex predators by hinting at naughty bits on the web?

Ah, but hope is not all lost! Hooray for V For Vendetta! Let the morons wake up naked and groggy while the little Japanese guy wonders what a chainsaw will do to a dry vagina. I'd rather see a good battle with a fascist regime, quite like ours. That world is somewhere in the 2020's as anyone with a Koran is executed while homosexuality sends you to somewhere you'll never be seen again. Everyone has their lives being tapped by the government. Our only hope is a man wearing a mask designed to resemble a man that tried to take down the government in 1605. This aint for the Britney crowd. Hoo-rah!

I don't know about you but V For Vendetta looks fucking fantastic! The theatrical trailer during the Super Bowl sold me completely. Natalie Portman, while she may not be your cup of tea, looked so nice in her pink ballerina outfit prior to taking up V's fight. I'm a sucker for women that are willing to fight back rather than just end up sloppy drunk in the arms of a moron.

Editor: "Is that your only problem with MTV's The Real World?"

I've read some entries on Diaryland with regards to a girl's first time so it's time for someone to come up with a defense for the boys.

Okay, yes, I agree that it is horrible for a guy to poke a girl and within 10 seconds, his spunk is released. She obviously didn't experience an orgasm so the whole virginity loss was dull. However, why does it always have to be a guy's fault? What I mean is that guys cannot just up and find a girl's pussy's most sensitive spot since all girls are unique. Shouldn't this be up to girls since it's pretty fucking obvious she should have been masturbating to find it?

The vagina is a complicated little frickle creature. I should know since I've loved and explored them as much as I could. It's just that I hate it how guys get all the blame for a girl's first time going bad. Yes, there is some ignorance since guys should learn a bit, especially since I know a lot of guys that think girls pee from it. 3 holes, boys. I know that's a lot but women have been working with them for years.

What I mean is that girls should have been at work down there long before their first times finding what works for them. Fingers straight in? Curve to the left? I've found that every girl has a portion in their vaginas that, when rubbed whether by cock or finger, causes them an instant cumming. Hell, even tell the dude instead of expecting him to find it. I know where Sara's is. She told me even though I found it pretty easily prior to her falling off the couch.

I'm not dissing but just wondering why so many girls don't get their heads out of their asses with regards to sex. Yeah, we blokes love to read/look at porn but it's not like they have a manual right next to the pictures to point out sexual secrets. To many, reading a porn mag is hard work while girls should be busy diddling away with themselves until they find what they need. Just be sure not to shout out about it or your father will come in while you are laying out with your kit off and a large puddle has formed underneath your once soaked pussy.

Here's a hint: Guys love to watch women masturbate. It's quite a turn on so you can figure out your naughty parts from there prior to that first time.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07