-Harry Potter And the Goblet Of Fire (in reference to taking that chance at asking a girl out to the Yule Ball)

Okay, before I begin, I'd like to tell all those that are finding my diary under "It's Hard To Be A Pimp Lyrics." I have no clue as to all the words. Nor do I care. All I know is that I am eagerly anticipating "It's Hard To Be A Ho" by a very daring female. You know it's just a matter of time but we're gonna have to wait since Lil Kim is serving time. Plus, Mariah Carey is not quite as loopy as she once was.

I'm not sure if this is out of line or not but "It's Hard To Poop........Sometimes" will not be a duet between Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston. Am I the only one laughing at this?

Lovely day for a stroll to Target, even if I hate shopping at ours due to the parking being such a pain. Little old ladies waking up early tend to be very viscious when it comes to the speed zone on sales days. Love the red as I avoid Wal-Mart's blue like the plague.

Bald-O and Hedgie: "Fuck Wal-Mart!"

Target had the new Harry Potter on sale but also with a neat-o little hologram cover instead of that dull one being sold elsewhere. Little old me just had to have it as I've been anticipating the March 7th release since first hearing about it. Yes, I am a Harry Potter fan tried and true since the issues he and Ron go through where so like my college dorm.

I remember telling Sara in the theater that I liked what I saw in Harry Potter And the Goblet Of Fire but it wasn't my favorite. The Prisoner Of Azkaban is but is now being placed into a lengthy fighting session since, yes, I found myself smiling even more on this second viewing. Maybe I missed some things due to all the excitement in seeing it in the theater but this one is a lot of fun.

Yeah, I know I'm supposed to enjoy movies for my age, like porn or times where guys sit around in tuxes talking about the old days but dammit! I want fun and Harry Potter books and movies always seem to deliver that time of wanderment as being a child changes into becoming an adult. Sure, the adults around Harry can grow annoying in their naive thinking here and there but I still love Dumbledore no matter how many times he didn't see the signs of danger.

A major part of my amazement is the Beauxbaton girls as they make their presences known. Oh, the dances as they walk by the boys unknowing as to why their wands aren't the only things moving in their pockets. The colors of this group of girls just drives me as I can watch their entrance over and over. As you can see, I am very much a submissive lad that loves women with extraordinary personalities.

Speak what you wish on Harry Potter books, movies, etc. I likes 'em just fine, folks and always can't wait for the next book even if it's the last. Someday, I'd like to go back over and read them again but skip the Dursleys portions due to my anger creeping up on how they treat little Harry. I'd use my wand to insert a hot coal up all their asses.

This latest Harry Potter movie does bring up my old insecurities when it comes to asking out girls. Ron is totally right on the fact that you may face a dragon but talking to a girl, a real live girl, about a potential date is one of the hardest things in life for a guy at that age. I may sound like I know women but that's not true, only about 65% of woman has been figured out by yours truly. I dare not venture further on that last 35% because I'm not that crazy.

As I said, I may be able to bench press 300 pounds or more but asking out a girl? Ugh, I'd rather be completely blind drunk if I'm unsure as to how she feels about me. Fear of rejection is something that tends to stay within for several days. Shot down? I've been there on a few occasions as it wasn't til I just let myself go in finally being me. I can talk to anyone now, be it a cheerleader or model and, yes, I have talked to both types.

I remember being shot down by my first major crush. Oh, it took a long time to get over that as I kept wondering why she's be with total dipshits over me. I swear, I just didn't get it but I'm not fretting. Let's just say that I saw her a few years ago, all 250 pounds. Revenge is a dish best served cold, but in this case, my long ago crush ate it and then some.

And so I also came back from talking to my former boss only to learn that there is a bar crawl this Sunday that is basically all my former co-workers. This sounds like fun? Yeah, but I have this really weird feeling about it because Clown will be there and I wonder just why a 40-something year old woman is just dying to get drunk (according to my boss, it's all she's been talking about at work) while her 3 kids are left at home.

Bar crawls? I've been on 3 total in my lifetime and admit to having a lot of fun. I'm just not into them anymore or maybe it's the fact that I practically had one in a trailer just this weekend where southern males told me how much they love me (I'm so cute, really) with their southern drawls. Drinking's just not my thing anymore when it comes to just wanting to get drunk.

Okay, maybe after a showing of O' Brother Where Art Thou? and some karaokeing...............we'll talk.

Never been on a bar crawl? It's simple. You go to a certain set of bars, namely a campus area, everyone wears the same t-shirt telling who is in this thing, and have 1 beer in each. Someone keeps tabs on the time spent, possibly 15 mintues, blows a whistle, and you move to the next bar. Repeat. On the first bar crawl I went on, I was drunk by the 4th or 5th bar. Really drunk and ended up dancing in the dirtiest way with a blonde that I did not know. Imagine the whole bar's occupants stopping to watch a tragic moment on the dance floor, and you'll get an idea as to what happened, a drunken white boy shaking his groove thing in the most impossible yet daring way imaginable.

Note: You can ask Bald-O all about what I did on the dance floor because he loves this story along with the one where I threw up on a friend's shoes on my birthday right after 2 girls insisted I put my hands down there pants to keep me from falling down on the floor. College life. That's my excuse. Plus, it was the beer bonged rum.

And so, we learn the terrors of asking out girls, my embarassing moments on the dance floors during college, and why bar crawls should not allow 40-year-old women that wear too much makeup. I am so glad I grew up but not enough to keep me from enjoying Harry Potter books. The things you can learn in college, eh? Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

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My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07