-Sammy

*Word for word since she doesn't like to capatalize.*

Where, oh, where do I begin on this? This is the note that started it all, a 4-year friendship that has never looked back. Yessirree, since 2002, Samantha (or "Stan" and "Homey D") and I have been talking back and forth due to life's many provided topics, namely whatever the hell happened in our lives.

The reason I am doing this entry is because Sammy's birthday is tomorrow. If you are asking, yes, she is legal as I've known her since her days of high school while I was in college and soon graduated. Isn't it great that the Internet helped a lost little brown girl from Texas find me?

I'm teasing. Sammy is what I call a "classic thinker" as she's always up for knowing and debating while other girls were more worried about their looks and cute boys. That's not to say that Sammy didn't like boys but was more into her boyfriend, Nick, a true man for leaving a rose on her car thanks to Valentine's Day. Who else finds that special part of his/her heart beating a little more at being surprised like that?

I don't know how to put it and I know how odd this is for a person to write about a girl he's never physically met but talked to over the 'Net for years, 4 fucking years! There were occasions where we both wanted to meet but life's little issues come up, namely the distance as I am just dying to sit across from Sammy. Why?

Are you freakin' kidding me!?! You put Sammy and I in a room and all hell will break loose thanks to a debate on various topics that will lead us far into the night. The two of us are very vocal and I am willing to bring up boy bands as a topic. Just where will O-Town fall into all this while Linkin Park has to come up somewhere? This is also the reason I know who Mike Shinoda is as I freely admit to owning a red Linkin Park t-shirt while not listening to the band.

Even Sara has called me out on this, owning a shirt of a band I don't even listen to.

You just don't dis my little brown girl from Texas, occasionally mistaken for a Mexican while fending off pharmacists as she picks up her birth control. Ah likes my girls that can spit venom like me all while being the best darn tootin' adventurer. How many out there would just pack up everything and move to another state all in the name of completely loving a boyfriend? How many?

Other than emails, I've gotten letters as well. It's so fun to see a person's handwriting since a tear-stained paper means a whole lot more than something from cyber space. Not that Sammy was crying but it's just to show you that being able to hold something gives you an extra pizzazz.

Of course, I've admitted to my little Sammy that I did have a crush on her long before I saw how beautiful she is. Hell, any kid in kindergarten willing to eat glue for her shows signs of that extra special something to get guys to not be able to pass. Those words on her diary and how that sly humor you have to be able to pick up in order to enjoy her all drew me in. I've never looked back and love how I received a lot of pictures from her as she was safe in allowing me to. I'm a sweetie, okay? Just don't tell anyone that those who know me real well never want me to leave.

I've learned lots of things, other than about Linkin Park (of course), as you just don't dis a girl that loves her Teddy Grahams (especially the chocolate chip ones, yo). There's wit behind every bite while talking about how a friend didn't know what a blowjob was when a parent mentioned a plastic snowman being deflated. It's fun to see the most innocent of girls' lack of knowledge in sex slang thanks to religious upbringing, right, Sammy?

Many entries back, I mentioned how I'd like someone to dress up as a gorilla while I wear a large banana costume so we can spend hours chasing each other in the park. Sammy's a definite gorilla potential after 4 years. Kids will be traumatized as they beging to think that bananas and gorillas have suddenly stopped getting along, huh?

One of the major discussions between Sammy and I has been over our love of Donnie Darko. You can also include the song, "Mad World," as the two of us listen to it under days of depressive shit holding us down. It's always nice to find someone that understands the beauty in sadness because feeling anything just reminds you you are alive.

So, Sammy, I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday as you are dealing with the inevitable visit of your mother. You've been a girl I can call a best friend even if I've never physically met you during these almost 4 years of emails. My girlfriends (PenDragon, J, and now Sara), life, work, and whatever obscene shit that comes out of my mouth, you've stuck through them with me as I've listened to your charm filled rants. Plus, you've encouraged me to stick with Diaryland as there were days in which I pretty much just wanted to quit. Little brown girls bored with Spanish need something to read, no?

Of course, I promise to hang with you someday when we both get the chance. You remember when I took off for Canada to meet someone I only knew through D-Land? Well, that whole week started off with a hug to that girl, PenDragon. I'm pretty sure I'm going to hug you big time while having you fly through the air. Trust me. I'm really strong so beware how happy I will get in meeting you so prepare to wear a gorilla outfit. Happy birthday, Samantha.

Yeah, yeah, I know. You probably don't necessarily wish to read how great one of my favorite Diarylanders is but that's that. March 16th is Sammy's birthday as I just wanted her to know that I played around with her in acting like I didn't know. Everyone should have 1 or 2 Diarylanders that they know they can count on more than anyone else on here. Almost 4 years is a long time as I have read every one of Sammy's entries while I'm not sure if she's read all mine. It's kind of hard when she was playing catch up in college by doing 30-50 at a time. Remember those days, Sammy?

So, how are you? I don't know about you but I am a little parched. I've spent much of the day debating how I was going to do this entry while also telling a girl in the comic shop that I love her Boondock Saints hoodie. Being as dumb as I am, I asked her if she had seen the movie.

Note: If you are a major Boondock Saints fan, they are releasing a major special edition soon. I *think* it's in May that I'll be able to get my hands on a copy. Yes, Boondock Saints is a cult classic for a reason. Good grief, how can you forget the cat ending up on the wall as an explanation on what is described as "shitty shooting?" I owe Sara for insisting I watch that movie.

So, I promise I will not bring high praise for anyone and resume my normal freaking program of talking sex and my daily observations as to what is wrong with this world. Penis size has so got to be revisited thanks to Sara's talking about mine this past weekend. Don't I just love the words that come out of this girl's mouth while no alcohol is needed? Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

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My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07