Walter: "'Brought it bowling'? I didn't rent it shoes. I'm not buying it a fucking beer. He's not taking your fucking turn, Dude."

Dude: "Man, if my fucking ex-wife asked me to take care of her fucking dog while she and her boyfriend went to Honolulu, I'd tell her to go fuck herself. Why can't you board it?"

Walter: "First of all, Dude, you don't have an ex. Secondly, this is a fucking show dog with fucking papers. You can't board it. It gets upset. It's hair falls out. Fucking dog has fucking papers. (Looking up) OVER THE LINE!"

-The Big Lebowski (And everyone knows what happens after this, Walter pulls out a handgun to accentuate his point on a bowler's walk over the line all while showing just how psycho he can be. We love Walter so we "mark it zero."

I love The Big Lebowski, even if I haven't seen it in such a long time. Sara wanted to watch this exact scene recently prior to another movie popped into the ol' DVD player. Just remember to warn people to be careful if there's a beverage present.

Okay, on with the show................

How many are happy that Star Jones quit the TV show, The View? I may not watch the show but, man, that lady (she looks like a gay black man in drag) was just a disgusting pig. I've never trusted a woman that has no love of animals and spends a vacation reading her own book on the beach. The rumor is that Barbara Walters didn't like her either. Maybe Star's star will simmer out into nothing so we don't have to see her saggy breasts at premiers.

One of my favorite bloggers got to attend the Mission Impossible 3 premier all while watching Tom Cruise make a complete tool of himself............again. Before entering the theater, people involved with this Scientology occult were handing out flyers for possible joiners. Creepy. It's scary how Tom presents himself as being so nice, etc. but Katie's parents hate him. Very creepy indeed but the girl gets $40 million if a divorce happens (as if there will be a wedding since we all know........*weak wrist*).

My lesbian friend of many wonders, Nicole, was in the gym tonight. She insisted on seeing pictures of Sara. After a few look-sees, we can now say that Sara is lesbian approved!

Went to Blockbuster to return a few DVDs. Right next to my car was a jeep with 3 local college football players. It was here that I felt weird walking behind them, 6'4' guys and quite big. If I had that kind of height, I, too, could be lined up with a bunch of guys just trying to get the ball 10 yards or more on each try. By the way, I am 5'10 and NOT football playing approved.

The reason? I got back from the gym after my latest run. Aren't I getting good about this? That high happens eventually as you start all that huffing and puffing. Unfortunately, I am also very sore with shin splints that look to be a result of wearing high top Nike Air's on the treadmill. Obviously, I need running shoes but I love high tops since I have this huge overprotection on my ankles. You would, too, if you had twisted them as much as I have.

And so I bring the inevitable question as to why we human being perform oral sex. Really, if you think about it, it is kind of odd to find yourself with a person's genitals in your mouth. Who would have thought that I would love sucking on the vagina's sweet sensitive lips and sticking my tongue in an area basically seen as where the penis belongs. We humans are an odd bunch, no?

There are a few reasons I bring this question up. One is that I find a few girls here on D-Land bragging about how great they are at orally servicing the man folk. It's sweet to read this, really. One should be proud at placing a full angry throbbing penis in her mouth while stroking it with her lips. Since I have been on the receiving end many times, I can tell you that any male going through this kind of act is in deep pleasure.

Another reason is that a book I read last month took into account the life of 4 high school girls. If you wish to know, it's called "Notebook Girls," and it's caused quite a stir. People or critics have labeled these girls as "promiscuous" and I call foul. About 80% of the book is about life as a teenage girl but since when does that not include thoughts on the subject of sex? What I found amusing was one girl overcoming her fear of giving a blowjob only to find it empowering.

Well, receiving a blowjob is extremely pleasurable due to the pressure of the lips stroking the cock's base to the head. Oh, it'll drive a man crazy since the pressure is far more pleasurable than being inside down there. But empowering?

I'll agree with the girl's account that it's damn cool to hold a person's pleasure in your hands (or mouth, in this case). Just seeing the reactions on the person's face as each movement causes some sort of wave of delight. There is that obvious sweet image of seeing a woman completely licking and devouring our most sensitive organ, too, but most of the time I'm too busy moaning and looking at the ceiling.

Again, it's just this complete easiness of being a guy that has blowjobs so easily accessible. All a girl has to do is unzip, yank down undies, and penis falls into mouth. She can take a blowjob anywhere, the park, hay rides, horse shows, and even a sensual moment during The Sopranos. Yes, it is a complete turn on to find a girlfriend pulling out my penis just to play with. Trust me. Just completely out of the blue blowjobs are fun.

I'll admit to getting a little rush even prior to going down on a girl. You all know me. I love the scent, look, feel, and taste of the vagina. What I may not always emphasize is that wicked smile a girl has prior to opening her legs. You know the type? It's that Oh-I-Am-So-Gonna-Cum-All-Over-His-Face look that has me want to do this so bad. Yes, my face gets a bit sticky.

Go back 15 years and I wouldn't believe you that women would brag about how good they are at going down on guys. Now, it's almost like an everyday occurence. Diaryland has a lot of girls that talk of how good they are or how they love to suck off their boyfriend/husband. According to one, nice girls swallow.

So, what's your technique? The porn star method is to grab your guy by the base of his cock and twist while sucking on the penis's head. There will be sudden stops to lick and suck on the balls but it's the twisting method that sets her apart. Most girls I've watched go down on me change the twisting form into a straight stroking up and down. Of course, much of this depends on where the guy's penis's tickle zone is. Mine's underneath the head but more along the main hard portion that goes towards my balls. Oh, yes, I love my balls licked as long as this is done right.

One thing that did make me giggle was seeing how some women absolutely go crazy with a cock in their mouths. The face turns a bit red as she sucks at a superhuman pace back and forth, while the world around her no longer means anything. These are the penis gobblers and are known to carry a lot of saliva.

However, there are women that have no clue as to how to give a blowjob. Seriously, J (my ex prior to Sara), thought that all she had to do was put her lips on my dick. That's it. No movement. It seemed like J just expected me to conjur up some semen for her like it exits similar to a fountain's spout. This is obviously why she always insisted I cum on her tits and grew bored.

In all seriousness, I asked Sara if I am any good at going down on her, something I just love to do. A simple yes came up and plenty more moments where she rides my tongue, something completely new to me. I always thought a girl riding a guy's face was just a figure of speech but who am I to argue. Whatever drives Sara crazy...........

Oral sex is just an immediate thrill in showing how much you care about the other's naughty parts. Why not? You are licking and sucking on the most sensitive area that is also not shown to others (unless you are a stripper or swinger) while being much closer than friends. It's possibly my complete love of the vagina that has me doing what I do with my tongue and lips. Plus, I just think a girl's asshole is cute and fun to look at during a good ol' 69'er.

Have you ever seen your asshole? Everyone's got one so it is odd that I have always loved looking at a girlfriend's asshole. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes but most resemble a starfish. Yes, there are little hairs that surround a girl's asshole but I don't care too much as long as they aren't as long as the hair on my head. I'm not much of a guy that thinks of anal sex but a girl's asshole is cute so keep 'em clean.

Well, I'm outta here after an okay day spent sweeping and hoped to work on putting the new pictures into the scrapbook only to find out I had no glue. Don't I sound like a girl? That's gonna be my next errand along with a visit to the bookstore to read. Funny thing is my dad's sleeping at a sleep center. Wonder if they'll take me in since I don't sleep much here. With Sara? I'm out like someone just shot me. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07