-Jon Stewart on President Bush's touting about his trip to Iraq.

What a weird day as a major newspaper is taking odds as to who in the Harry Potter series will be offed (Harry's at 20% while Voldemort is 100%), Britney Spears has gone nude for Harper's Bazaar, Star Jones got her ass canned (HOORAY!), and rappers really wanna hang out with Oprah. Life really has changed ever since Tom Cruise stopped being an American media whore.

FYI: Tom was in Japan.

I've got to agree with a national reporter on the rappers versus Oprah feud. If your whole ideal is to base yourself on fucking the establishment while calling just about all women "bitches" and "ho's," I'm gonna get all Oprah on ya. Why does a woman that believes in talking in a correct manner have to invite people that continue to contribute in the downfall of society? I've never seen rappers do anything beneficial other than brag about how you have to deal in the 'hood BUT tell kids not to do it. So, why do people like Jeezy make it sound so glamorous?

It's no wonder black kids are so fucked up these days. They think that society owes them something and that all that materialism is deserved. I've never known that black kids knew who Legerfeld (Chanel's main designer) and Gucci were until Lil Kim started bragging about them.

I hate it even more how anyone that starts talking sense in how black society is backwards on who it perceives as enemies is considered a racist. When you've got black leaders sittin' around with rappers drinking Hennesey, you know who's sold out while they blame white people. Sharpton and Jesse sold out long ago while making money off of their fake love of Martin Luthor King.

Britney has gone nude for Harper's Bazaar. I've seen the pictures and can say that it took a lot of makeup to make her actually look good. Lordy, it's still white trash that cries about media attention while whoring herself out. Confused? Me, too, and could someone tell Britney not to chew gum during an interview?

How many danced a jig after hearing that Star Jones got canned? Me, too! I don't even watch the TV show, The View, but I just cannot stand that woman that looks like a black man in drag all while dragging that gay husband of hers.

Karma is a bitch. At least, Slut Watcher can say that. I forgot to tell you that last night's workout was extra special (even if I almost puked) thanks to him being tortured for a short while. Stinky Pakastani was using the Butt Blaster next to him and all sorts of smells were coming out, hopefully his ass.

Slut Watcher is...........Slut Watcher. I mean, he's a nice guy and all that but it annoys me how he always calls ever girl either a "slut" or "lil' whore." Hell, SW even does this when I talk to my friends that just so happen to be very pretty. The worst is when he constantly tries to look up every girl's shorts or down a sports bra or two. The fact that SW got some ass scent is a nice thing.

Now, yesterday's nasty run on the treadmill brought about nauseous feelings where I came very close to puking. Today was a whole other story as I fucking ran like a mad mo'fo' for those 15 minutes. Topped out at 7.9rpm but there's a reason for all that.

Zoolander. I think that movie is fucking hilarious. The scene I was at while running (and laughing hard) was where Derrick has to face Hansel in a "walk-off" where each model has to do his best walk, etc. It's been a while since I've seen Hansel pull the underwear out of his pants without removing them. The girl next to me was laughing as well.

While Zoolander was playing, one of the gym's workers came to ask which TV channel to change. No one wanted Zoolander to disappear and I would have taken that remote to beat him to death if he had. My run was so fucking good while laughing so blood surging all around will help you keep that fire going. Too bad I did the wrong workout, biceps instead of shoulders. I swear I thought today was Thursday.

Apparently, I am getting to be hot stuff again. While Sara gets hit on by gay guys, I've got a couple girls that insist on giving me a lot of attention. One blonde won't stop staring at me each chance she has while another wants to work out with me. I'm impressed with the second one and I'll tell you why.

She does a really good core workout where she warms up with a major beating of the warm up back. Gloves, of course. Then, she'll do jump-rope followed by a hard ab routine that ends with cardio (usually SPIN). Nice workout but Sara shouldn't be worried. I'm pretty sure she's gay while she likes how crazy my workout is to the point that I am seriously dripping puddles wherever I go.

In no way will I ever change my workout around. I love what I do and how great I feel afterward. Sure, the asscrack sweat sucks along with sticky balls but, hey, I have to listen to you girls bitch about UTIs and periods. You try having something this large bounce around for a little over an hour. Tits don't count.

I'm just so overjoyed that Slut Watcher was so mad about Stinky Pakastani that I keep replaying how mad he was. Here I was many machines down doing my chest while he kept giving me these faces. SW was too hazy to look up this one girl's shorts that was working out near him. The power is truly in the ass, at times.

It's funny how I realize that I haven't been that talkative with people lately. Sure, I miss having a lot of friends around but I'm so busy with little things here and there that I only notice every now and then how empty I am here. I do miss people every now and then but the amount of media to keep my mind occupied is crazy. You'd never need people if you revel in creativity.

Having a girlfriend that's about 1 hour and 19 minutes away is an odd one. There are times that she'd love to take advantage of my sex drive when it goes completely crazy. I'm so up and down all the time that one day all I can think about is licking and sucking her pussy only to quiet down the next. Vampires need blood. Guess what I need. I've always been one of those rare boys to admit that the vagina is extremely powerful.

Well, we cannot forget that Sara has a birthday. July 2nd is the day as I've got a pretty good idea as to what to get her. Always the creative one but more or less sneaky. How many play dumb only to surprise at some point? As long as I am calm, I can pinpoint certain things.

So, I leave you here as I need to get back to Blade the Series on Spike TV. It's okay and "Sticky" is no Blade, just the outfit is correct along with some of the weapons. Why can't we bring back Little House On the Prairie so we can bring some kind of unity within the family moments? I'm kidding. We need violence and fart jokes, lots of fart jokes. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07