-Dogwitch's 'Poddy' character

Well, I'm gonna do a terribly dangerous thing while working on tonight's entry. People are gonna get hurt as I scour my head for the insane thoughts I love to spit out here on D-Land. Some people drink. Others get baked out of their minds. Those lucky enough to find it, do peyote. Me? I'm eating cinnamon Teddy Grahams so get a load of me.

I'm not exactly completely sheltered. There have been many incidents in my life that surprise people, knowing how I look. For one thing, I've been shot at. I've been lucky enough to have broken a bone in order to end my curiousity over that issue. I've thrown up exactly 23 times in one day only to feel fine after that final one. A friend of mine died while skydiving, a most horrible way to go.

FYI: Never ever break a bone. It is the most horrible experience that warranted more than 8 weeks of pain.

The one thing that has escaped me has to do with the homosexual lifestyle. I may know a few gay guys like Gay Nick and even some lesbians that I can't think of right now but I've never seen a couple act like.......a couple. Hell, Gay Nick is so shy on discussing his meeting of various boys on his trips to Chicago that I would almost have to tell you that I've never seen boys fawn over one another.

Sara has a college friend named Bri, the all knowing, whom will easily bring you into his fold. There's so much to talk about once you meet him as the gay vibes play around your mental state like pixies spreading their dust. It's like Sara told me:

"People are just drawn to him."

So, it was a nice night to see Bri again, the day before the 4th. He had come down from New York with his boyfriend to spend time at his parents' house. On first glance, I would have sworn that the boyfriend was straight as I didn't see much of him for some time. A boy has to spend some time lighting firecrackers out of his butt while girls squeal, ya know.

It was when all of us, Bri, Carrie (the twin sister), Sara, and Alex, played a card game in the main room of the house while the curtains flew around thanks to the light wind. It was late and Bri's boyfriend sat right in front of me. Once Alex opened his mouth, I got so amused by how he talked and made his actions known. You'd swear that there was a girl in that male body.

I loved it! I know it's kind of odd to say that but I like seeing new things when it comes to people. Alex was so amusingly gay that I couldn't take my eyes off of how he reacted to various things. I'd watch how he and Bri would talk and become playful with each other. Sara told me that the word "baby" was thrown out there so many times but that's not what got me.

I'm not completely sure but I've always thought that in gay relationships that one is more masculine while the other is most feminine. Knowing what I saw, Alex was the feminine part seeing as he walked around sipping his coffee and making sure Carrie had her hoodie on correctly. It was...........well...........cute to see all this, something I've never seen before.

My knowledge of the homosexual lifestyle comes from books, that Human Sexuality class, and movies like Birdcage. How could you not have liked Birdcage!?! First of all, it has the funniest dialogue and the chance to see Gene Hackman in drag. You just cannot go wrong with it comes to having a gay male housekeeper that sings "She Works Hard For the Money" by Donna Summer while wearing tiny tight shorts. Remember that men like to smear.

Editor: "SMEAR! Oh, no! I broke my toast!"

What you may or may not have noticed was the conversation as to how gay guys may see us. In Birdcage, Nathan Lane and Robin Williams try their best to figure out how to act "straight" in order to fool their son's parents. Of course, it results in a funny portion since neither side can figure that one out. There is no one way we all act.

Why do most people in power have such a distaste for gays? A stastic showed that homosexuals power almost $62 billion dollars into the economy. If only the ignorance would come off of mean old men.

I don't know what else to say but the fact that I'm happy to be open-minded and have gay guys be natural around me. Gay Nick told me that my appearance almost says that I'm a jock that will beat up those that I disagree with so it took him 2 years til I knew he was gay. There will be no more jokes about how bad my gaydar is. It is so incredibly bad that I even thought Nathan Lane was straight til late last year.

Today was so nice. My dog, Buffy, was happy to have me lay in bed and watch TV while she worked the windows. She gets lonely while working the neighborhood watch so time spent with Making the Band 3 was worth it. Man, that show is getting dull while this group keeps getting worse. Diddy is a complete fool and should only stick to hype.

My mom even spent some time asking me about Sara when it comes to her art, whether is was painting or sculpture. This all came up because I'm taking off again for Indiana due to her entering an art show. I'm hoping there is alcohol and a little dog to keep me company because I know nothing when it comes to an art show. When I asked, Sara thought I was wondering if it was like a science fair, where you stand next to your piece and explain. Hopefully, they will have a stool to sit on while I sit with the little dog.

So, I'm outta here as I'm happy to know that some of you enjoyed the 4th. Sara and I were on the main bridge and watched the fireworks come out. That's not all that came out but also so much white trash and people that you could have sworn lived under a bridge or 2 thanks to candy bars like Baby Ruth....

Sloth: "Baby.....Ruth. Ha Ha"

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