-Talladega Nights

Remember the large spider out on my wooden deck? Interesting thing, I got to see her boyfriend. Now, I know this is possibly not an interesting thing to you but I find spiders fascinating and, well, a little different. You see, most spiders spend their lives alone so seeing her mate is completely new for me. Normally, if the male is worthy, she'll mate and then eat him. Looks like the dude is not a cad.

Also, I'd like to add that I wondered why I saw a few baby spiders walking around me while I looked at this large (but sexyily striped) spider. Now, we know where these little guys get their looks from seeing as the male lurking in the corner hopes to live another day. Girls can be so mean.

Did you know there is a family of monkeys called the Banobos (sp?) where the females rule? Normally, you'd hear of others related to this type that are pretty fucked up. Rapes and violence, for instance. Well, these girls, the Banobos, don't fuck around! If a male acts up in anway, the girls are called in as a group with sticks and stones to beat the shit out of the idiot. Poor guy probably has to put out every night when he'd rather watch football.

Did you hear that? Football season is upon us! I'm happy since this means more to watch while running on the treadmill during those lazy Sunday afternoons. I'll admit to thinking it's crazy how each channel has so many analysts but the game keeps me from realizing I have 15 more minutes of running.

Today, I got a crazy look from Slut Watcher when I told him I don't think Nascar is a sport. "Neither is golf" was his excuse but I already thought that as well. Nascar people are in a whole other world of insanity (or stupidity).

There are 2 things I find mighty sexy. The first one was what I came upon after my workout. While I was driving home, I saw this very pretty girl jogging. Now, you'd think I was staring at her while her boobies bounced but totally not true. The reason is that there was a puppy leading the way. Ask Sara how crazy I am about dogs since I always point out one when I'm with her. Girls working out with puppies are the sexiest things in the world.

The second thing is this Fergie song, "London Bridge." I've thought about it a bit and keep coming up with the same answer, the girl is done talking about oral sex. If you've read about 1,000 or more of my entries, you know for a fact that I love to hear/read a woman's account on her love of receiving such a loving act. The only thing that could make it hotter would be that gorgeous bird, Cassie, singing it instead.

*Fergie kind of looks like a man, a man with great abs*

It's been a long time since I've read an entry on Diaryland in regards to oral loving. Not only have the shirts been kept on when it comes to a girl presenting herself on Diaryland but also no more naughty descriptions that get me all hot and bothered. Help a brotha' out and talk dirty to me. I'm always dying to know why licking in certain ways brings more pleasure. Sometimes, I like to do it from behind since the view is, oh, so nice. Does the tongue's starting point to the end point make a good oral session matter?

Yes, sometimes, I wish I was a girl so a big strapping buck could eat me out and then I'd know what I need to know. Knowing me, it'll probably 2 in the pink and 1 in the stink. Whee! Let's get all randy!

I'm having my ups and downs with Ebay. While it's nice to see the storage room being emptied thanks to Dad's selling old things of his, it's a lot of work every now and then. First of all, my comics put up for sale are our quite the learning events. You'll notice this by our picture taking skills since some have a little shine on the comics.

But we're doing better. Our next batch will be pictured under lights and presented better. Hopefully, this will lower the amount of questions since nerds and dorks want to know everything when it comes to their bootie. "Is the comic flat?" "Are there any dinks?" "How's the color of the pages?" These guys are in luck since I'm an honest seller and the comics were well-kept over the years.

All of my comics are being watched so I'm dying to know how things will go on that last day when it comes to finding out who wins in the bidding. One person emailed wanting to end it all by offering me over $100 for one of the comics. No can do since it's against Ebay rules.

Don't go getting the idea that I'm completely selling out. Nosirree, I am just moving some valuable things out but bringing things in that will eventually go up in value. My mind kind of works like a seller of stock in that I'll have things for the future to make more money. So, Sara, I'll still have a collection. Things are going out while others to make room for others. I'm so lucky to have friends in the business.

Too bad my mind is pretty loopy when the sight of female flesh is pictured so elegantly. Thanks to being in dire need of a datebook due to my Buffy the Vampire Slayer's almost finished, I picked up the 2007 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue one in hopes that I can just pick right up on September 1st. Nope. Starts in January and I blame the sight of Yamilla Diaz's gorgeous ass. Place a cute puppy in the picture and it's heaven.

I will be looking for a new Buffy the Vampire Slayer datebook starting now while I don't know what I'll do with the S.I. Swimsuit one.

Well, I hope Sara goes to get that professional massage. I'm starting to think I need it thanks to Ebay. You'll find me on the 'Net quite a bit keeping tabs on what is going on with my comics. It's addicting to see how many people are watching you and having people insist that you end the bidding and sell to them. It's even better to see the storage room in this house looking much nicer.

So, be sure to pick up your Christina Aguilera CDs tomorrow. This goes for you, too, Samantha. Put a little flava in your ear, namely some horns. It's time music is back and, no, I'm not talking about that stupid Paris Hilton CD coming out soon. Stars are blind? You need to be deaf to enjoy Paris. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07