-Dodgeball

My advice? Never ever visit a driver's license facility after the weekend is over. It's been a while since I've encountered that many people at one time all while searching for parking. At a driver's license facility!?! There was not one but two large mack trucks parked there while I witnessed person after person I breaking several rules of the road. Any other person driving by might have thought that Lynard Skynard was in town with its usual southern followers and groupies.

Walking into a driver's license facility is always scary. It's here that you must mingle with the best and worst society has to offer when it comes to our breeding habits. You may have been able to avoid them earlier but Abu is now right next to you while the usual flies have called dibs on various body parts.

So, what was I doing in our lovely DMV place? Besides being so happy that I have not had a traffic ticket for.........oh, many, many years, I was forced to pay our state vehicle title fee of $78. How much is yours, folks? I'm pretty sure California is the worst but I cannot deny being curious as to how much others pay to be able to drive.

Remember, driving is a priviledge, not a right. It just makes it so much easier to get late night drive-in food because they'll just laugh at you if you walk up to the window. Yes, we all had our college moments.

Prior to my dramatic entrance into my gym, I thought to myself how great it is that I haven't been injured for a long time thanks to my workouts. All muscles have been working at their best. No more worrying that the slightest hit on my damaged biceps would cause a tear of some type.

Bad me. I've now got an injury, small to some but bad to me. It's the burning in my inner thighs that is killing me. Chafing, it's not just a common womanly dilemma but a side-effect from treadmills. I'd rather have fallen down on one than walk for 20 minutes with a nasty burning feeling. I thought I was able to walk just fine. Anybody go through this?

Yeah, I'm asking for help and wanting to know license title fees. Aren't I a great talker?

So, with that in mind and the possibility of you being in the snooze position (driver's license facilities are a great breeding ground for conversation), I bring you the news that somewhere in Japan there was a 500 person orgy. I shit you not! Pictures made it all a reality while the giant smiles of various Japanese women being pleased while pleasing was pretty cool. I'm one that believes good sex is where people look like they are having fun rather than with absolutely no expression at all.

So, what do you see in some kind of room as big as a stadium? Well, everyone's naked but that's not the point. It's that I read how Japanese are the most sexually depressed people while Brazil are the most sexually crazy. I forgot where America is in our sex ratings system that seems to pop up ever month.

But you didn't see how happy everyone was! There didn't seem to be any sexual repressiveness. Women were giving handjobs while some guy was underneath eating them out. A lot of blowjobs were being given and even some actual full-on sex like doggiestyle was happening in the center while the guys had their balls massaged at the same time. I don't know about you but this would be one event I'd love to sit back and watch since I am such a sucker for knowing people's sexual habits.

But, of course, there are dark times in America. While there are people telling us that we should be having sex that they see fit, VH1 has gone slumming. I'd never thought that a show would present it first series debut episode on a woman taking a dump on a man's floor. We've heard about Whitney Houston's "doody bubble" where Bobby Brown talked about helping his wife relieve herself of a "turd that was too big" but never would I have thought that a woman would take a dump on the floor and be so proud.

In case you haven't heard what show I am talking about, it's VH1's Flava Of Love. People I know have told me to watch this show, namely Tamallah and Bald-O. They swore that I'd laugh my ass off and I must admit that..........I did. You've got Flava Flav, a man that looks like a burnt troll that needs to go back under the bridge for the rest of his life, being pursued by, brace yourselves, ho's. I never ever thought I'd use that word but these women (I'm using that term loosely) are the most disgusting I've ever seen in my life.

Tamallah was telling me that she was quite disgusted in the women's behavior on Flava Of Love. I can see why because there are so many stereotypes on display with no thought on how fucked up these girls are behaving. I'm not joking. Most of them are, basically, ugly women all fighting over the chance to be with a guy that looks like a fucking troll. A poop pile from a large black woman in porn to a white woman that wants to have "dark children" with Flav, you'll see what I mean. Disgusting? Yeah, but why am I interested in the next episode?

So, the rule with me is that you can poop but I don't want to know about it. Peeing in front of me is just fine since all of my girlfriends just seem to sit on down while I brush my teeth. It's the wild girls that have the amazing ability to pee on the buildings' walls that amaze me. Who knew women can pee like race horses while they insist I stand there to watch for cops.

Ebay? Quiet for today so that's nice. Once it gets close to the closing bell on some of these comics, I'm sure things will heat up. I'm curious as to how much the Spiderman comics will sell since one is already above what its worth. That hype from Spiderman 3 might help.

Sorry for making this short but my eye's dryness is bothering me tonight. Oh, and, Sammy, ask Nick for advice on how I should send comics through the mail. I've already got a pretty good idea but I want to make sure. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07