Pagent Judge #1: "Aw that's sweet. Honey, where's your grandpa?"

Olive: "In the trunk of our car."

-Little Miss Sunshine

And so I am back here at home only to find that even more spiders have made the wooden deck their homes. The scary part is that these are the meanest of the bunch and a person must observe extreme caution around them. Black widows or "Red Backs" are bad but the lot I am talking about call for amputation of limb bitten.

The brown recluse has decided to live on top of the outside garbage can in the corner. Not just one but 2 have made it their home as I was a little suspicious about a certain web for some time. Out of all the spiders around in my backyard, I had yet to meet the occupants here. It took a little bait (moth) and out came the hungry nasty to take it deeper into the web.

The brown recluse is famous not just for being so dangerous but also for how hard it is to find. It is just as its name suggests, a recluse. Everytime I walk out onto the deck, I can see slight motion in this web only to soon see the spider rush back into the thick web portion. The brown recluse is super shy but I don't think any of you wish to meet it. Nasty bite.

FYI: I am still hoping to come across an actual black widow, something I've never seen in real life along with a trap door spider.

I hate coming back to find that someone on Diaryland has been dumped by a guy she really liked. No entries out of her since the event took place but I bet there are some empty Ben & Jerrys all around her apartment. For guys, it's video games and farting contests. Just remember, it depends on how sophisticated the guy is.

As I said to Sara last night, I've noticed how we've become quite the couple. I lay on the couch watching Season 5 of The Sopranos while she was on her knees working on a couple paintings. There's independance but also I confess that it's fun to watch Sara so into something. I've no clue as to art but the paintings on the floor were nice to look at.

Now, I know you think that much of being a couple has more to do with sexual matters. For some, yes, but I like how it's pleasant along with both of us just trotting along. Sara and I, well, I shouldn't speak for her, but I can say that I feel quite safe.

The problem I had in the beginning with Sara was the adrenaline overload. You may not realize it but things that are new can cause you to get more hyper or hungrier due to the body's nervousness in some way. It took forever for me since my relationship is unusual. I only see Sara for periods of time throughout each month while others every weekend. It's no wonder I was so hungry all the time.

So, that's where I am at, now eating fish and chicken instead of cheeseburgers. Plus, you can say that it's nice how Sara eats healthy as well. My stomach had battles within thanks to the consumption of too much dead cow. No more for I want to eat better and feel better. How many want to stop excessive farting in their sleep? Eat more chicken.

Yeah, I know that this all sounds weird to you. It's also that I loved how Sara woke up and hit the gym, leaving me to fend for myself with the DVD, Gangs Of New York (Nice flick! Loved The Butcher and, yes, "cunny" was a naughty word, Hiss). It would have been nice to work out but I don't belong to Sara's gym nor could I do my thing on an empty stomach. This body needs major fuel in order to lift the kind of weight that people keep coming up to me to say:

"That's a lot."

Yes, I know that and thank you for observing just how many plates are lined up on the bar. It would be kind of cooler and a hell of a lot more original if you came up to me just to say that I have a hot little ass.

Not that I believe in forcing someone to do things I find perfect in my life, working out. It's just that I believe everyone should take care of their bodies as best they can. If you don't care about it, why should someone else?

So, I sit here with mucho anticipation over the upcoming road trip to Atlanta. You know the drill. 10 hour drive to see a major overload of virgins in costumes hoping to attract other virgins or just to drool over a Serenity character (Darth Maul is so last year). I may not be a virgin but I definitely wish to see Summer Glau, a Serenity character.

Other celebrities I hope to get an autograph of picture of:

1). Tom Savini. Seen a Friday the 13th? From Dusk Til Dawn (he played Sex Machine)? He's an actor but more well-known for his gory makeup techniques.

2). George A Romero. Zombie god. He's who you think of when you want to have a great director make a zombie film. Dawn Of the Dead ring a bell?

3) Harry Potter actors and actresses. Neville Longbottom will be there along with Harry Potter's crush. Why do I feel weird about enjoying the acting of people much young than me?

4). I'll do the Darth Maul thing that I screwed up last year. Yeah, I forgot to get this guy's autograph (Sara knows why). This actor is so small but an amazing martial artist.

5). Nicholas Brandon. Our beloved Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Xander, part of the Scooby Gang. You could always expect a funny quote out of him.

6). This Baywatch Hawaii girl. I hated Baywatch but couldn't take my eyes off of her.

7). Sara's favorite comic artist because I loved the art Sara framed for her apartment.

I'm sure there's more but the whole point is to see people enjoy being insane by putting more effort into a costume than meeting the opposite sex. Trust me. I will put up pictures, lot of them thanks to the fact that I will bring 3 digital cameras this time. Some of the best costumes came out when I was low on how many shots I had left. I will never forget the Lego Star Wars characters.

- - 2009-07-07

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