-Don Marquis

Wanna know why my eyes are so bad? Or how about why a few people asked me if I'm alright? I'm running on about 5 hours of sleep that has had me running errands and doing a full-on workout that most people would pass out doing. I'm like a super being or something but with red eyes.

Maybe I'm evil.

And so I sit here wondering just how crazed this world has gotten thanks to the revealation of Britney Spears's pussy. Yessirree, it's all over the 'Net thanks to one lucky paparazzi photographer that just so happened to be there the moment, Britney without panties and in a mini-skirt, exited a vehicle. The world no longer has to hold its breath. We have seen the pussy and it is...........

Ugly? Wow, I never thought I'd say this about Britney's pink taco but it's definitely not something I find desirable. Could it be her taste in men? Lack of intelligence? Bad taste in friends? Horrible knowledge when it comes to taking care of kids? A woman with 2 kids out on the town flashing the world her bizznazz is quite tacky. Then again, Britney's bald pussy has caused quite a bit of debate across the forums.

And so I consulted my lesbian friend with the wrapped hands, Lauren. It may sound odd to sit there and talk about what makes a good pussy with a girl but that is me. You cannot take away my insane need to know other people's opinions on something that matters so highly with me. Plus, working out is not a great thing unless you have friends that can keep you in stitches over things your mother insists you shut the fuck up about.

My gym has so many men that feel the need to talk and talk about football. I'd rather discuss cunts.

And so I sat with Lauren to fill my head with the knowledge. 1 pussy eater to another, we both came to the agreement that completely bare around the pink parts makes for good licking. A small amount of pubes in the form of a 'stache would be the icing on the cake. Something about a girl telling me that eye catching is when another girl pulls her panties down, there must be something to look at.

I don't know. It was such a goofy night in the gym thanks to Lauren coming out of the boxing area to work out with us mere mortals. We were in our sessions nearby each other so there was a lot of giggling. Who doesn't talk about crotches?

Again, I am far too tired to discuss our favorite topic. I'm running on very little sleep because Doggie Central opened early today. Here I was in deep sleep after getting home at 6:15am only to find that, 3 hours later, a dog was lost. Never again after that did I get to finish what I started. More or less became a short nap only to end up with a headache. At least the lost dog found its home and I was able to get through another ultimate workout even if my eyes were red. Some people say I look angry and intense now.

If it's work you want to know about, I'll tell you this. The managers continue to be clueless as to how doors work, where things are, and oblivious to what is going on around them. It is nice to be locked out of the store because I get to watch crows chew up a used diaper in the parking lot. Mondays are when I get felt up by our favorite naughty Mexican, Dirty Sanchez.

"I have dos big balls."

So, if you must, go look up the pictures of Britney Spears exiting a vehicle all while showing the world her c-section scar and her bizznazz. I love the sight of pussy but this one just stopped me from even thinking about eating tacos for a short while. Everyone loves a good flashing but this'll be the only time you hear a guy telling her to put that thang away. Small rodents and cooked carrots will forever be scarred. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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