-"Take On Me" by A-Ha

I've learned that it takes me 2 days to recover from work. The first would be me waking up around 2pm only to realize that half the day is gone and I still have yet to run my errands. Second has me more relaxed because I get up at my normal 9am time in a state of having actual sleep. It's no wonder no one wants the night-crew job for we do the store's dirty work.

Still enjoying Karen Russell's 'St. Lucy's School For Girls.....' because it's just such an odd book of various stories involving children. Much of it has me in wonders since I've never been on an alligator farm nor have I ever seen baby turtles hatch on a beach. Then again, a swamp containing a succubus sounds promising even if it could be seducing a 16-year-old girl.

I'd like to state that my life's pursuit has been founded. Never in all my life have I ever met a snow-plow man. Not once. You'd see these guys drive around in humongous trucks that push snow to the side with the occasional destruction of a child's snowman. How would I ever meet someone I look up to that's willing to drive such late hours destroying nature's pure white powder?

Richard. Yes, my friend with the enormous gut and headphones is Mr. Plow, someone we all know from.......well, I forgot. What was Mr. Plow? Anyway, for $30/hour, Richard heads on out there to rid our roads of nasty snow for 8-10 hours. Don't be surprised if there is a moment where I end up in that truck with my head hanging out the window to laugh evily at small children that want their snowmen kept alive. No! None! They shall die along with the sleds that lazy kids leave out in the front yards.

Editor: "I have seen evil and it is Hedgehoggy riding shotgun with a fat balding dude."

Yes, I know I have friends that do all sorts of weird things. All I have left is a shark researcher, penguin wrangler, and completely nude strippers for friends. My lifetime goal of being Keira Knightley's panties will never be reached. Such powerful absorption!

Editor: "From a snow-plow fantasy to........ugh."

Why are men so afraid of women that can beat them up? Just because she can hit the heavy bag or speed bag with far more accuracy and deadliness than a male does not mean she is worthless. I've always been an admirer of girls that can kick ass so it's no wonder that a lot of my favorite movies have this sort of theme. How many times must I stand up and say, "Run, bitch! Take off your heels and kick his ass!" Aliens got it right. Send a woman to kick a large female alien's ass since the males are too busy testing out their masculinity.

Of course, this all goes on to what Richard said to me about Lauren yesterday and again tonight. To him, she's cute but the fact that she walks around with her hands wrapped up like a boxer after hitting the heavy bag concerns him.

I've no problem with a woman kicking male ass. In fact, I've told Sara that she is welcome to go at it while I watch. That is, if the situation calls for it. Lauren, I know for a fact, will do some major damage to any guy thinking she's an easy target due to her being so small. At 5'2,' I'm always in awe at how hard she can hit.

Remember that very special episode of Saved By the Bell (Hands down, Sammy) where Zach dated the female wrestler that just so happened to take down a male rival from another school only to be dumped because of this? This just goes to show you how pathetic my mind is, remembering ridiculous stuff but I've always held it in that girls can be tough.

Then again, it could be the fact that Screech's video of him sticking his finger up a girl's butt reminds me of all sorts of Saved By the Bell episodes. Kelly couldn't afford to go to the Prom. Screech fell for Violet at Glee Club even though Mr. Tuttle, for some reason, didn't know they cheated on the singing portion. But, hey, Zach and the gang saved the local wildlife from drillers.

Yes, Richard and Lauren were in the gym tonight. That means that I had to deal with various discussions from DVDs to wondering why Lauren's hands weren't wrapped just this once. She took Spin class with a friend (not a girlfriend) while Richard continues to say I'm "smooth" because girls are always talking to me. Whatever. There was more meat to a conversation when I got into a discussion on old-time wrestlers from the 80's.

No, I was never a Hulkamaniac but just not able to look away at really bad acting in spandex.

Other than that, I've got an urge to shop for some strange reason. Will have to stop this thinking by putting my nose in the book, 'St. Lucy's....' I've just not enough patience to deal with Holiday shoppers.

Ever heard of the porn star, Katie Morgan? Nice girl with a tendency to be very blunt. HBO had an interview with her for its Real Sex show. Of course, we got to see her naked and in action but completely naked throughout the interview? How about all that on a stool in a theater-like setting while various people involved sat down to watch/listen.

The funny thing is that, yes, I was admiring Katie's tone physique while she talked. It's just that as more and more of the interview went on, I found it less on the staring and more on the listening. Like I've said before, porn stars can give better interviews than Hollywood actors/actresses. Sara, Lauren, and I can talk pussies and cocks just like this girl sitting completely naked on a stool. Me like and I can totally understand Katie's feelings on saving anal sex for something she does with her boyfriend and not on camera.

Editor: "Cheeky lil' bird, eh?"

And so I'm outta here after the Net's forcing another day of Britney Spears without panties. Now, we've got video to salivate over but not I. A woman with 2 kids, barely anything of an education while chewing gum during an interview, and flashing what looks like an overly stubbled taco just doesn't do it for me. Maybe it was all the skid marks from Cheetos that stopped Britney from wearing underwear. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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