Okay, now if you live in the U.S. or have any sort of access to getting a copy of the newest issue of 'Us Weekly,' please do. The image I am trying to give you as to what I define as class is here. On page 73, I was completely stunned at how beautiful Prince Williams's girlfriend is. Not only is she beautiful but also with an amazing sense of style. It's no joke. If I were to come across this woman, Kate Middleton, on a street, I'd just stop and tell her how classy she looks.

I am not afraid to tell a woman how gorgeous, classy, amazing, or stylish she is.

I've told you how I will be quite wealthy one day. This also goes along with Kate Middleton. Not only is she pretty well-off but you don't see her flaunting her wealth. The girl drives a VW not a Ferarri or giant SUV with tinted windows. If anything, Britney Spears can take lessons from Kate on what class is.

Note: It sickens me to hear that Britney might be pregnant again.

While I would love to go on even more about class, alas, I cannot. Today was an awfully horrible day due to my dad's sudden battle with pneumonia. He is in the emergency room and has been there since early afternoon. My mother has spent pretty much the whole time there but is now home.

It has been complete chaos thanks to 5 dogs all needing something different all at once. First, I deal with 5-Pound Phooey and her need to curl up with me. Next, it's 'Hoss' and Jethro that insist on being fed on time. And finally, it's Bonnie and Clyde that need some exercise after being in their kennels for too long.

So, imagine with me, if you will about how I've spent a good 2 hours laying on my parents' bed with TV dinners on my stomach as 2 dogs, Bonnie and Clyde, try to get some of that Philadelphia cheesesteak. Lean Pockets are awesome while VH1's Surreal Life schtick comes back to life with some reunion of the idiots. Vanilla Ice is da shit but poor Ron Jeremy is looking like a jackass that doesn't get it. Mini-Me should get over being called a 'midget' and realize he's done nothing since Austin Powers ended.

If you get the chance, go ahead and turn to 'Us Weekly's' newest issue (Britney's on the cover-ugh) and turn to page 73. It's one of the most beautiful looks I've ever seen as Kate walks toward the paparazzi. A slight smile. That's class and I doubt she'd chew gum while giving an interview on TV. Prince William picked a good one!

I'm sorry for this type of entry. My dad's being in the emergency room has me not so in the mood to do what I was about to do, my annual vagina entry. Oh, and I was so in the mood because 'Tart was telling me about the use of the word 'quim' being more common than I thought. Most slang for 'vagina' is pretty cool but you've got to remember this. It's only recently that I've started to use the word 'pussy' as I mean it as a term of endearment. It's Friday so hopefully all of you have received kisses on your little pussies tonight. I'm pretty sure I'll be gone tomorrow to kiss Sara's. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07