*Answer at bottom*

Okay, the reason I ask the above question has something to do with what is bothering me. I feel really stupid. Not just the usual confused stupid but lost with a squad of Spicollis (Fast Times At Ridgemont High) telling me that the sound of their Vans hitting something was their skulls. I got outsmarted by 5th Graders.

There is a new show on Fox that is simply titled 'Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?' That's pretty much all you need to know as you watch contestants work their way up from.......get this...1st Grade questions. Those are considered the easiest while the tops, 5th Grade, is the hardest. While I pride myself in answering question after question on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire,' I suck when it comes to 1st through 5th Grade.

Think you're so smart? How many cups are in 4.5 gallons? What Era are we living in? What is the name for the brightest star? What year did Abraham Lincoln become president?

Oh, how Mrs. Thompson, Miss Beiser, and so on would freak out that their little amazing student, yours truly, would now fail 1st through 5th Grade. No Billy Madison for me (Yes, I did fantasize what it would be like to go through all the grades again as well as learn how to terrorize girls all over again because I must have some issues or I just plain need some self esteem).

Normally, I'm not someone that watches much TV but my mother having 'Are You...' got me to sit down as she watched. Question after question was asked to adults while 1st through 5th Grade kids challenged them. I got 1 answer correct. That is all. Just be glad that I didn't say we lived in the Paleozoic Era because the correct one is Cenozoic. I used to be so good with that question thanks to my obsession with dinosaurs.

Note: 'Are You Smarter....' is not perfect. While the cute smart kids challenging clueless adults is great (What is it about chunky white boys in glasses-reminding me of myself?) fun, too much time is wasted on the host's humor. I'm always into these types of questions because this whole family joins in. My mom, a former 3rd Grade teacher, didn't answer correctly but gave it real go. I'm just mildly retarded so that's my excuse.

Fact: If I was on this TV show, I would find myself having to use the Copy option a lot more than I'd like to admit. Looking into the eyes of 9-year-old and hoping that he/she has the right answer is not a worry when you have no clue but can easily remember in vivid detail how Britney Spears exited a vehicle with no underwear and you nearly lost your lunch.

Ever felt like something spoke to you? I've talked about the story on how I discovered the band, Garbage, where I was in a used CD store and felt like I had to pick up this used CD that drove me crazy with so many songs. Now, it's a book called 'Go Ask Ogre' by Jolene Siana in the biography section that pulled me in.

It's true. I was standing there looking at the sexual health section in my local bookstore for anything new because that's where they put anything related to nakedness or erotica. Not that I was looking for freaky stuff but sometimes biographies from porn stars or those with a tale to tell from the sex industries can be fun. On my left was a fierce looking book in the biography section that caught my eye. Covers may not be the most important aspect but they sure as hell should catch your eye.

'Go Ask Ogre' is about a girl growing up that used to write to a member of the band, Skinny Puppy. This guy kept all of her letters throughout this time in the 80's, a girl in love with death metal and looking mighty unstable. I find her look to be super hot so I'm going to be in the minority due to most guys I know thinking that perfect women are those with giant tits, blonde, and telling a guy that she, like, totally has to blow them or she'll explode.

Of course, I haven't started on 'Go Ask Ogre' because I've already got Ayaan's 'Infidel' but I just had to read this. This member of an old 80's band keeping intimate letters written to him by a fan, meeting her one day to show this by giving them back 9 years later, and seeing very deep personal thinking from a girl growing up at this time is a gem. While many think the 'Net's usage of blogging as a complete waste of time, I wouldn't count this girl as one of those debating on which boy to date. This girl had real problems and was begging someone to listen.

Note: I've heard of the band, Skinny Puppy, but not their music. That was a long time ago but, then again, I still remember Frankie Goes To Hollywood and the beauty of The Police.

As for me, I'm meeting more and more people in my gym since new members are showing up. This week, a tiny Ohio State track star and I talk quite a bit since she's amusing during her workouts. Those legs are incredible looking as she does these sudden bursts of movement to burn extra calories after bench-pressing. Plus, I get pats on the back from her as I leave the gym. I'm so friendly that it's just a matter of time til someone smacks my ass and my weakness is discovered.

"The older I get, the better I once was."

That's the slogan on a t-shirt worn by this older guy in my gym. It's true because every now and then I get to witness former bodybuilders desperately trying to cling to some form of youth. One guy was upset while looking in the mirror thanks to the large belly. If he'd focus more on his abs instead of arms and chest, things would be different but you know how guys get about doing sit-ups.

Men: "If the remote control is between my legs, I will do a sit-up."

So, I'm outta here and in hopes of doing something erotic again. Spring brings out a few things in my mind, namely those that have to do with sex. Not surprisingly, a lot of you spent a lot of time in my last entry. Was it the note on female circumcision? Surely, you knew about that! Or was it why I enjoy cumming on a woman's skin? Either way, I just enjoy knowing I still have some effect on people all while remaining true. I've had girly juices on me and don't care how ridiculous that sounds to a religious freak or married woman now near faint after reading that since she thinks that semen should only be allowed inside a woman. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07