-Underworld's tagline

You wanna know one of the hardest things? Watching movies or TV shows where couples go out to dinner. I don't get that as often as I like because I'm here and she's just a little over an hour away. We both like our time away from each other but seeing a couple have a great time while I lay there with a 4-legged critter that constantly nibbles my ears after a run outside just isn't enough.

Okay, maybe it is on occasion when I get licked on my neck. Sara will tell you that I'm ticklish there, even when she bites me.

Lately, we're hearing all sorts of things about global warming and what could result. While I am not going to dispute such a thing, I do find it amusing how several predictions have us at odds with different countries all thanks to a pursuit of water. I'm fine with the Middle East suffering the most because I have this real hard time with those types of people. You followed your religion to it's core, goodbye.

Yes, I can be a little bit of a shithead. Oh, please, like you're any better. Tell me how you sat there during all those riots over a cartoon making fun of Muhammed. Were you quiet? Or did it make you wonder how fucking loony people from the Middle East are? To think a lot of this is the fact that they are so scared of sex.

But that's a whole other argument and, yes, I will admit that the sight of religious fucks like that make me angry. What gets to me is how I worry that this world is going to go into chaos. You know it's not getting any better. Our newscenters are more concerned about Anna Nicole Smith and Don Imus than our shit-for-brains president making things worse in Iraq. His actions breed terrorists. It's so in the goddamn playbook, people!

Ever seen Mad Max or Road Warrior? How about 28 Days or even Dawn Of the Dead? From the way I see it, chaos is kind of what we need. Too many people breeds too many idiots that just make this world worse. Prisons are overcrowded so I say we bring back public hangings. Our health insurance issues are enormous so let's get rid of those that can't seem to keep themselves clean. Meth addicts get the firing squad. Rappers will be sent to an Island like Lost so we can see just how tough (or how many bullets they can take) they are.

It's no secret that I'm curious as to what it would be like to go to war. Would I defend honorably? I sure as hell would make sure my family and Sara are safe. Would you know what to do?

Don't believe me? Russia is fucking cutting itself off from Democracy. The Middle East is a mess beyond repair. Africa is just fucking nuts with the genocide thing that Bush continues to ignore. India just smells bad and has taken our wealth. China is going through more fossil fuels and, as a result, is building fatter Chinese. Japan hasn't built a good quality ninja for over 20 years.

Who knows. Maybe we'll find a way to stop sucking the Saudis' dick in order to import oil. It would be nice to make them turn over all that wealth by begging us for water.

As for me, I'm worn out. If you don't know, I suffer heavily from allergies. Pollen and dust are worse enemies than the common housefly. You know how much I hate houseflies, though, so that says something. I just felt that since I was changing my room around for the better that I'd clean up all dust I could find. Thank you, Swiffer! My room is leaner and meaner than ever.

Plus, the weather was nice enough for 2 runs with 5-Pound Phooey. Oh, and she loved both by running for much longer periods of time. No more poopin' out at the corner. That little bitch can run all the way home now. My goal has always been to wear 5-Pound Phooey out by nighttime and it works. The only problem is that I tend to feel like I need a nap, too.

Note: I have a heart issue so all this running has been very good for me personally. The feeling is incredible after a run and tends to take away a small amount of my depression.

Sometimes, I have a tendency to think that Sara is not happy with me. There are certain things I just cannot seem to help. My body, for one, suffers majorly from allergies so bleeding from my nose everyday while in Indiana has me realizing it all too much. That cat, Lenore, is too cute to push away no matter how much I sneeze.

I have a tendency to look at all the bad things about myself. Ignore the good? Always! Why would I be the type of person that finds himself so amazing? Because the only thing that I consider special about myself is my blue eyes. As for why Sara curls up next to me, you'll have to ask her.

You know that thing about guys' sexual fantasies? I've never understood the lust for cheerleaders. Sure, some are hot and, yes, I dated a couple. For me, it's always been a cute nurse outfit or schoolgirl. We boys are so damn curious about panties and anything that brings about short skirts gets cocks throbbing.

It's always been about doing naughty things that bring us to sexual fantasies. Looking up girls' skirts reminds me of all those times I hoped for a glimpse of a crush's panties. What color? Are there flowers? The goldmine would be a very good idea as to the size of her pussy lips thanks to the scrunching of panties. Do you girls realize how hard it was to sit at a desk at that age when Wendy accidently let it slip out?

But as you grow up, things change. I get more turned on when I see a woman able to use weapons or defend herself with a well-focused mind. I've seen far too many panties that, while I enjoy the way they curve around you ass, I just hope you have a nice color on as you read this (hopefully red or light blue). Look at it this way. As much as I loved Selene's tight leather outfit for hunting down werewolves in Underworld, I really got hot over her ability to fire automatic handguns.

That doesn't mean I'm over my love of pussy stains. It's always art to know when a girl is wet because it is a complete craft to feel up a girl and realize that the back of my hand during each rub feels nature's nectar. Every girl wets differently and every girl should experience being eaten out while wearing panties. You'd be so boring to not show your pussy stains with pride after seeing the boy's throbbing enjoyment.

And so I am outta here. While I got to see The Sopranos (Wow! More whackings!?!) and Entourage (Gotta love Arti's pursuit to save his gay assistant from being pimped in a gay club), The Tudors has been missed. Henry VIII may be a pawn to the bishop but it's Anne Beleyn that's got me curious. Does she avoid a beheading? Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

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