-The Donnas

Actually, I sing that song when Sara undresses to put on pajamas right before we hit the living room to watch a DVD. Many times, she gives me a weird look and I shut up right away. Some people just don't get my humor when it comes to disrobing because I loved it when Sara had me dance around a chair right before a mating session.

9 billion bees have gone missing. Scientists fear that cell phones are the cause or just part of the cause due to the bees' navigational systems screwing up. Will you be someone worth allowing a place to live on this earth by putting your cell phone away? Nobody in the restaurant wants to know you're telling someone that you're eating beans and brocolli. Save the bees. Whack a cell phone talker today. Do it real hard just to be sure.

Been looking at a photographer's collection of nudes. You know how there are certain ones that make you cringe while others you just think are so beautiful that you're comfortable with your mother seeing? Me, too! I have an amazingly impressive topless Madonna shot that my mom seems to like. John Peri has so many pictures I'd love to own and frame if I had a loft.

I'm serious. I love nudes and they are so perfect that I wouldn't hide them during a visit from my mother. 'Penthouse' has too many that make me feel a little dirty. 'Playboy' has lost it's edge and seems to favor boring poses. John Peri has earned a model's trust as you'll see how relaxed these women are. So, so beautiful and I want at least 50 of them to frame.

Showtime can chalk up another addict. If it's not The Tudors (Henry the VIII) and Debbie Does Dallas........Again, it's Weeds, something about a woman played by Mary-Louise Parker that has to resort to selling weed in order to keep what she has. My dad and I both love this actress and I've already stated that he's been into this show. However, I have a different reason.

A deaf character! How great is that? I rarely come across someone in TV shows or movies that has something different. Spoiled teenagers are fine but I need something with zing. Since I've only seen this deaf character once I can't really say it's a strong one. Funny to find she was tricked into having cyber sex with another character. Trust me. It's a special kind of humor.

Of course, I do love to be represented well. After a long walk (no running because it was a new route), I caught sight of Mark Wahlberg's The Corrupter from way back in 1999. Looks like all it takes for us muscle guys is a t-shirt and leather jacket to make us look good.

Sara's been on my case about my job hunting. She says I've been looking in the wrong area and should be pursuing personal training. Would you believe that's what my friends from college keep telling me?

I don't know. I've always believed the old saying, "Don't shit where you eat." That's why I try to keep working out and life seperate. The gym is a sanctuary for me to release all of the day's tensions and become a wild animal bent on testing my limits. You've seen pools of sweat? Well, I've bled before but still kept going at it after I dropped a weight on my finger. Nothing stops me from feeling the euphoria of endorphins floating in my head.

So, employment took a chance on me. That place I went to for an application is a gym, an upscale one. While I'm fearful of being around rich arrogant snobs, I will at least be where I kill the wild animal inside. Trust me. I used to work out at a gym of this type and hated it. A woman even hinted at fucking me while her husband watched. Yuck.

I don't know. An upscale gym. I've only been in the lobby so there is a definite curiousity factor. What kind of equipment? People? Employees? My gym is attended by mostly blue collar types, those that just got off of working hard labor or for The Man. It would be different to listen to those that bitch about owning a business.

To workout, all you need is 30 minutes of some form of cardio with 30 minutes of weight training. How would I be able to explain that all those plastic gadgets advertised on TV don't work?

Ever heard of the band, Queen? Hopefully, you have as I found out that, thanks to the 'Net, the legend of their music video is fact. Way back in the late 70's, Queen put out a song about 'fat-bottomed-girls' or something like that. The album had just that, large assed women but riding on bikes.

The legend was that 65 girls went completely nude while riding 10-speed bikes. There were pictures but a video? Not possible, I say! Nay, there really was one as I saw it earlier today. 65 women completely naked riding 10-speed bicycles. Awesome! I'd be perfectly fine while riding in the back.

"Ooh, she's rising up again. Bravo! Look at the pink strawberry, mon cheri! Could use a bit of a trim but still edible. I have now allowed my penis to do all the turning on my 10-speed."

Don't you love the power of the 'Net? Someone out there had the smarts to save something I would have thought was just complete bullshit. If I had been born around that time to see the filming of 65 naked women riding 10-speeds, I would have died a very happy baby.

My mom's biopsy is on the 30th so I thought I'd do a very special Hedgehoggy tribute to the female breast soon. You know me. I always have this feeling of joy on describing my love of girly parts and how y'all shouldn't look down on them so much. We males are always looked to as powerful all because we have this dangling large piece of skin hanging down between our legs that I say we need to celebrate boobies and pussy just as much.

Goofiness aside, I still hate to hear that my mother goes into surgery. My orders are to be here because I have to do all the lifting as it's an outpatient procedure. There has never been a breast cancer moment in our family but Mum wants to be sure.

So, there you have it. We'll talk tits as I try to avoid my fears over Mum's surgery. You know what? I'm also kind of hurt. People have been spending obscene amounts of time in my diary but never take a moment to say hi or to give me hell. Diaryland used to be a place I'd have to deal with uber feminists sending me nasty guestbook entries or notes. No more. Various other people get 4-10 notes a day but not me. I'm a pitbull but a very nice pitbull that wonders why people read me so much just never taking the time. For that, I've rethought about putting up more pictures. Happy twats all around.

- - 2009-07-07

Love Facebook - 2009-05-07

Retards Away! - 2009-02-16

Jackasses! I Sees 'Em! - 2008-11-28

My Birthday Happened - 2008-09-07